OpheliaRising's Journal

 
It is fairly late here- or early depending upon how you wish to look at it. My sleep schedule has been messed up since my grandmother passed away in March. I am slowly but surely trying to flip it around so I can hold normal hours as I seem more productive that way.

Something within me stirs. I can feel it…an awakening perhaps? I close my eyes and I feel her near…(her being my grandmother) and with her she brings all those before us- whose blood who runs through my veins. I can feel how much they love me too and I don’t even know their names. I embrace this love and take it to the hire power within me. Grateful I am to feel this…presence.

When I look to my past she is there. When I look to my future all I see is light. What greatness will be bestowed upon me the great grandchild of the one that was called Katherine? All seems so blurry but in the best way possible. Tomorrow what will it hold? Will I be brave enough to fight against the tide or will I let it take me where the wind blows?

I see possibilities….hope…I feel hope. So many colors surround me and creativity bursts forth but what will all this manifest? I pray it turns out to be something- a stepping stone for which will lead to something grand.

Husband said the ring of blue around my eyes has grown darker and more prominent. Does this mean her strength is growing stronger within me or is it my own?

I have been working diligently at my anxiety workbook. I want to better understand, I want tools for which I can use to break free from this hell. School starts back again in May. I am excited. I graduate in Dec of this year. Me…graduate from College. Husband said he is taking me tomorrow to pick up a few school supplies I need. Perhaps in my travels I will find a project to weave all this energy into. Maybe I can dabble in something I know absolutely nothing about...or maybe I will just fly a kite....

I hope all of you are well.

~Bright Blessings~
Rea