All my chapters have now been officially …
All my chapters have now been officially planned out. There's 15 in total if you want to count the prologue. And …
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I thought "teal" might be a nice choice for today's entry. I know I haven't been on in a long time, and I'm planning on amending that, but I've been feeling so terrible that I haven't felt like sitting at the computer and writing. I would have checked "terrible" for the longest time on the little faces if I had been logging on.
I don't even know where to begin on this message. I'm dying. That's what they're telling me now. I just haven't really taken it in. I think I'm still in "denial" mode. This just can't be real. I'm only thirty-five years old. I've been through an awful lot, including having four major organs, even my stomach, removed, but I just can't die yet. I still have things to do. I have plans!!! I have to see my three nephews grow up!! We're moving to California and I'm going to be involved in their lives!! I'm going to live with my brother!! I'm going to be a published writer!! I'm hesitant to send my completed stories in now, because they are a series that would entail approximately 20-25 books, and whereas I have six completed--enough to give a publisher a sample of my work and get the stories published--I don't want to commit to something that I can't finish. Maybe I'll send them in if I finish the entire series so that even if I perish, the stories will go on.
I just don't have words to describe how I feel about this. The only thing that buffers me up is that the doctors have told me that I'm dying so many times before and I've lived that I no longer believe them. Still, this one is a shocker. What has happened is that my immune system is so suppressed that I am getting all these severe infections--I've been on Cipro for a KILLER UTI for almost five months now--and I had a shot of an antibiotic, I forget what it was called, yesterday at the drs, because I have really bad pneumonia now.
Well that's about all I have to say today. God bless all who read this.
Love In Christ,
Shannon
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I'm sorry to hear this. I lost my Mom in Jan. and I'm taking care of my elderly Dad with dementia. There are times I can't go on. I also had a killer UTI (aren't they just AWFUL!!!?). It went on for two years. I'm thinking stress can ruin our immune systems, too. I've lost most of my family in just a few years and found out recently that my cousin, aged 36, has colon cancer. He's battling it bravely. Sometimes a person can just feel so bad and not know what to do about all the suffering, their own and their loved ones. Your books sound wonderful. That's so great that you're a writer. I always wanted to do that but I'm afraid I wouldn't be very good at it. I hope your work gets published. That would be exciting. I wish something good like that could happen for the both of us. For me, it's just been misery for such a long time. You're in my prayers to have a long, wonderful, published, loving aunt life.
SusG
SWEETIE,
GOD IS THE ULTIMATE HEALER. ONLY GOD KNOWS WHEN IT'S TIME FOR OUR APPOINTED SUNSETS. YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR, SO MUCH TO DO, SO MUCH TO SEE. JUST STAY TRUE TO YOUR FAITH AND GOD WILL NEVER LET YOU DOWN. ALWAYS REMEMBER, THAT WHEN IT IS TIME FOR OUR SUNSETS, IT IS ONLY FOR A LIL WHILE. GOD WILL RAISE YOU BACK UP ON THAT BEAUTIFUL DAY THAT HE PROMISED US AND WE WILL LIVE IN PARADISE FOREVER MORE. GOD IS GOOD. YOU ARE SUCH AN ANGEL AND A FIGHTER. WE ARE KINDRED SPIRITS. JUST KEEP THE FIGHT TILL THE END! IM FIGHTING WITH YOU SWEETIE.
LOVE YA FROM HEAVEN AND BACK,
NIECY
LovelyNiecy
There are no words to describe how your words have affected me. I feel your pain, my dear sweet sister!!! I think God has much bigger plans for you than you have for yourself!!!! I will pray that God gives you the strength and courage to start on this new journey of yours. May God hold you in the palm of his hand and comfort you in the darkest of hours. Much love!!
angelndisguise