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Well, i have been off work all week with one off my legendary migraines and work are being far from helpful. I feel like ever since i had all that time off last year with depression, they feel the need to scrutinize everythime i'm off poorly, almost as if they dont believe me. Almost making me feel as if i sumhow deserve to feel like utter crap, llike i've asked for it. I just wish they'd realsise that their reactions do nothing towards helping me feel better.
Well, i'm starting to feel like my old self! I'm waking on a morning smiling, instead of wanting to crawl under the duvet. I'm still on the anti depressants but im no longer reliant on the sleeping tablets to have a good nights sleep, just every now and then when i have my dark days, which are getting less and less frequent. Still seeing my councillor, but not every week. Feel like im finally getting back to my old self.
My boyfriend of 4 and a half years proposed 3 weeks ago, so i'm walking round in my own little dream world!
I'm not being distant or rude, but work have updated the sites i cannot access there,and unfortuntley i cannot acccess this site in my lunch hour anymore, so i have to do so from home, and as a rule i don't go on the internet at home. this has really upset me, as i feel i have no one to talk to about how i feel. i daren't mention to anyone at work, in case it gets back to managers and i lose my job. People think i'm taking the piss when i call in sick,, but i can't discribe to them how i'm feeling. In their eyes, i shouldn't be depressed anymore. But in my eyes, i'm in this dark hole, that i cant get out of no matter how much i try. Please help, i dont know what to do anymore.
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Past Entries
| October 2007 |
Wednesday, 10/31
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It really is hard for people that have never experienced depression to understand what we go through. They don't understand it nor do they understand how hard it can be to climb out of it. Please let me know if there is anything I can do.
eliza1977