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Hi peeps.......after the vicious attacks of the last 4 days, I think things are finally starting to settle down.....although I am amused at how much certain members of that group are STILL referring their posts about me.....and what an UTTER bad person I am!! Trying to defend ones actions by talking about it constantly means GUILT! I dont feel the need to respond to any of this as its school yard behaviour and the type I can rise above. Even though a few times I have wanted to speak my mind and, if nothing else, respond in my OWN defense....which I cant do as I am banned, I actually dont NEED to defend myself against people who choose to behave like that!!! So, I am hoping this is all over now....and that I can continue on with my friends, TRUE friends.
So...the Good News...is..I am off to Budapest next week...ye ha! Work related but Im really looking forward to it. I have been highly praised by my boss in work which is great news and something I am proud of. It took me a few months to be able to work again and I was SO scared of being in that environment again, scared incase I couldnt cope etc....but, its all going well for me. I have also been asked to go to Portugal before the end of the year.....even more ye ha!!
So...good news indeed chicks.......catch ya all real soon.
Peace, strength and belief in ourselves!
xx
Comments
This is posted on the Physical and Emotional Abuse survivors group....and its about me! Its written by someone who doesnt know me at all...and infact is a fairly new member to the site. Is this the kind of people you expect to get on an Abuse Forum? Its lovely indeed.......just more justification.....
To that nasty bitter piece of work that is sactimonious and hypacritical: Where in the hell do you get off being such a royal bitch? What are you missing in your therapy sessions? This fucking world is not all about you and have NO FUCKING RIGHT to trash others, abuse others, hurt others and judge others. What the hell?
Been abused - maybe you have - I don't know. And what did that teach you? To be bitter and judgmental - small minded and hostile? You have a truly ROTTEN mind set and attitude. You diagnosed yourself best - bitter and old - those are qualities that do not age make but mental attitude. You have no compassion and no abilty to be gentle with others pain because you are thinking it's all about your pain. You are egocentric with a chip on your shoulder bigger than I've seen. I feel terribly sorry that you had a hard time and have suffered as I'm sure you have but GUESS WHAT you selfish nitwit - we all have - it's why we're here. I thank God that you skewed view of the world is done here. You aren't healed at all - you haven't even started - you are still roiling in anger and pain and denial. You are putting on a song and dance that is totally transparent. And you protest about how great you feel way to much. You aren't ok and the way you make it ok to be you is justify your narrow angry outlook and use name calling, invalidation, and disrespect of others opinions. You do to others what you say they are doing to you - No one broke your trust - ypu broke ours. you attacked me because you don't like me thinking we can learn from each other? I think you are a pathetic shell of a person with to much pain and anger - You're not healed - you're not doing ok - you are turning into what you are so angry about. You can run as fast as you want, you can be as loud and nasty and deflect to others as much as you want - you can name call and be a bitch as much as you want - the lack of healing is still there, your fear and pain are still there, your lack of compassion are still there - your basic bitter personality - still there. You aren't a person of character - as loud, but "that's my fucking opinion" people usually aren't. I'm glad your true colors came out you petty, small minded, nasty, unhealed witch. Go justify your meaness and your actions and just keep running, keep running, keep running, keep justifying your verbally attacking self by saying it just your" opinion, no offense hun "- you are what you are - no matter how loud you are, no matter how fast you run, no matter how indignant you get when you're called on your crappy behavior. You are what you are a bitter petty, small minded, mean spirited, uncaring UNHEALED arrogant ***** And lol- I made you flipping angry. Good for me - than I'm doing ok - because I am healing and I do know that compassion and kindness and support is what we're here for. And I do know that love that is true kindness and caring can make a life better. Because I know that we can learn from each other. Because I can not group entire groups of people together. Because I have the abilty to take people as they are and because I believe you are innocent until proven guilty. Because i realize my opinion is just that - my opinion. That no one else needs to agree with it. Because I can take a LIFE of abuse and know there is good in the world still and good in people still. Because I see much pain and because bad things happen in this world but I know that I don't have to be one of those things. Because I am strong and can stand up for others. Because I can make a difference. Because I am an advocate. You don't actually have enough courage to look in yourself and heal - it is false courage to huff and puff and name call. True courage is facing the demons and healing - Oh and by the way - really didn't matter that you weren't around for a couple of weeks - kinda nice and peaceful actually. Not all of us love sactimonious venom as much as you.
Been abused - maybe you have - I don't know. And what did that teach you? To be bitter and judgmental - small minded and hostile? You have a truly ROTTEN mind set and attitude. You diagnosed yourself best - bitter and old - those are qualities that do not age make but mental attitude. You have no compassion and no abilty to be gentle with others pain because you are thinking it's all about your pain. You are egocentric with a chip on your shoulder bigger than I've seen. I feel terribly sorry that you had a hard time and have suffered as I'm sure you have but GUESS WHAT you selfish nitwit - we all have - it's why we're here. I thank God that you skewed view of the world is done here. You aren't healed at all - you haven't even started - you are still roiling in anger and pain and denial. You are putting on a song and dance that is totally transparent. And you protest about how great you feel way to much. You aren't ok and the way you make it ok to be you is justify your narrow angry outlook and use name calling, invalidation, and disrespect of others opinions. You do to others what you say they are doing to you - No one broke your trust - ypu broke ours. you attacked me because you don't like me thinking we can learn from each other? I think you are a pathetic shell of a person with to much pain and anger - You're not healed - you're not doing ok - you are turning into what you are so angry about. You can run as fast as you want, you can be as loud and nasty and deflect to others as much as you want - you can name call and be a bitch as much as you want - the lack of healing is still there, your fear and pain are still there, your lack of compassion are still there - your basic bitter personality - still there. You aren't a person of character - as loud, but "that's my fucking opinion" people usually aren't. I'm glad your true colors came out you petty, small minded, nasty, unhealed witch. Go justify your meaness and your actions and just keep running, keep running, keep running, keep justifying your verbally attacking self by saying it just your" opinion, no offense hun "- you are what you are - no matter how loud you are, no matter how fast you run, no matter how indignant you get when you're called on your crappy behavior. You are what you are a bitter petty, small minded, mean spirited, uncaring UNHEALED arrogant ***** And lol- I made you flipping angry. Good for me - than I'm doing ok - because I am healing and I do know that compassion and kindness and support is what we're here for. And I do know that love that is true kindness and caring can make a life better. Because I know that we can learn from each other. Because I can not group entire groups of people together. Because I have the abilty to take people as they are and because I believe you are innocent until proven guilty. Because i realize my opinion is just that - my opinion. That no one else needs to agree with it. Because I can take a LIFE of abuse and know there is good in the world still and good in people still. Because I see much pain and because bad things happen in this world but I know that I don't have to be one of those things. Because I am strong and can stand up for others. Because I can make a difference. Because I am an advocate. You don't actually have enough courage to look in yourself and heal - it is false courage to huff and puff and name call. True courage is facing the demons and healing - Oh and by the way - really didn't matter that you weren't around for a couple of weeks - kinda nice and peaceful actually. Not all of us love sactimonious venom as much as you.
Comments
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This is a dreadful thing to have to read about yourself......but then only someone that doesnt know me could write this....others KNOW how untrue it is....including the groups founder.
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Its terrible abfab...and should NEVER have been allowed be posted in a forum for posting ABOUT 'abusers'...People in charge should apologise to you..for choosing to post it..
EVERYONE knew it was about you...and the moderstor of that forum also admitted she knew it was about you...and still posted it...Its really ruined things here for a lot of people...Trust has been broken, and 'inner' very highly personal groups have been formed.. I don't really see how this damage can be undone now?..
I don't blame the poster...Its the huge ammount of loyaty shit and arse licking thats led to this..and i haven't finished having my say about whats going on...fully, yet..
My thoughts are with you...NOBODY for NO reason deserved to have that posted about them...It was totally innapropriate to allow it go up...
Stay strong...and do know, whatever your opinions, I respect them..and if you ever said anything i didn't like or I thought was wrong or hurtful or whatever..I would deal with you in person..as I know enough about you by now..to know you have a great heart..And you would listen..and always would mean well...XX
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HERE HERE!!!
xxx.
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Oh and by the way, it did matter that you wernt here for a couple of weeks, i missed you!!!
xxx
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This was wrong. Pure and simple. And every post that followed it reinforced that fact. It was abusive, and having it come out of the mouth of a fellow survivor makes it even more painful. Not only was trust broken, it was shredded and thrown in your face. Please stay strong, and know that karma does indeed exist. What goes around comes around. The best we can hope for is to be standing there when it comes around so we can watch it.
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Glad I missed the whole post. I really question the healing being experienced by someone who spends the better part of an hour judging and criticizing others in a public post. Hope you can shake this off.
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You know what baffles me chicks...is that what I HAD said TO that person to warrant such an evil attack? I do remember accusing her of living in a Disney type world, that I felt she was naive and innocent...I also added that maybe that was because I was a bitter and twisted old bitch? I am trying SO hard to remember any other correspondence to warrant such abuse....but...its a bit of a mystery. The only other piece I can think of in my responses was to a MAN in the group who had already been abusive and lets say "Short" with me before. I told him to get over himself.......was this all SO rude? Or is this all because what I was saying on the original discussion all becoming a little too honest for people to handle and therefore they felt the need to attack....was I going to sit there and take it? I think NOT! AS you say QV, I believe that Karma exists. I stand by what I thought and what I said in response to others, because I refuse to be trampled on, or ganged up on, hey...been there! That was a Witch Hunt if ever I saw one. I thank you all for your understanding, your compassion and most of all....your belief in me. xxx
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She posted that to defend *him*. She even said so in a hug to him.
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I have no idea of the context of that post as I don't hang out at that group, but I do know abuse when I see it and I am sorry you got it coming your way. Abuse is wrong and it should not happen.
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ppl like that make me sick. i am sorry hun but glad you are ok regardless. fuck her, she is ignorant!
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hmmmmmmm.. I have no answers but just continue being who you are.. I like you as you.. big bear hugs.. Y'Vonne
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Honestly abfab I've been on here for a while and I know that this is abso nonsence about you and what right has this person got to make such open judgements about you like this. ABFAB... YOU RE a KIND HEARTED PERSON, helpful, funny and I think you re great xxxx Feel bad that someone has been so harsh on you as they CLEARLY don't know you at all. Are they judging you by their own standards?????? Oh by the way I have no idea about this post....just popped in to say hi lol
One of the worst things I personally find very difficult to forgive is BETRAYAL. This, I am sure, is stemming from my past abuse history and one that will ALWAYS be difficult for me.
I dont believe that betrayal is acceptable in any shape or form, whether that be in personal life, in work or indeed, on here.
The hardest issue I have regarding betrayal is that your trust, dignity, pride and esteem are very hurt by those carrying out the betrayal and especially after suffering abuse, these are things that need to be worked very hard on and indeed re learnt but I am constantly working on improving these issues and I am winning on that front.
I have never been a quiet, retiring individual...hey, I have opinions!!! (Funny enough) There is nothing I like more than a healthy debate...and I have also learned a lot from healthy debate too...I have discovered I am not always right!!!!
When I form an opinion, I like to think I do that based on evidence and not on a whim! I am confident of my own thoughts and opinions and will stick by them a bit like morals, I guess. This is especially prevalent when forming opinions about people....a first impression may not always be right and based on future evidence, your opinion may alter, sometimes for the better, other times for the worst.
If your opinion about a person or persons changes for what you believe to be for the worst, depending on what way your new opinion grows, sometimes it becomes necessary to cut ties with people. This is not a nice way to feel about anyone but after betrayal I feel this is very justified.
I cannot be 2 faced about things..I never have and I never will, I speak my mind and I expect others to do this too, I expect others to speak their OWN minds...and not what other people try and coerce them into doing and saying.
The lesson I have learnt over this past few days...is that MY opinions, in this instance, were indeed correct....and I fully stand by them. So, I have NO pain, no anger, no remorse, only my own justification that what I did was right....and to me, thats all that matters.
Abfab
xx
Past Entries
good for you P xxxxxxx
rossiroo
Yes you're still being told you are bad..and that anyone who cares about you is being told that they need to fuckoff..Its all become pretty abusive..what with your private messages being made public, and people being openly and knowingly allowed try to tear you to shreds..and now still being allowed post insinuating rants so obviously concering you and this situation..But hey..its all okay..
You're well away from it now..and have loads of friends here..who won't let anyone abuse you...no matter what opinions you choose to express..or what feelings you feel..
have a great day today! XX
never you mind honey..
vonniedisley
honey, fuck 'em all.
As for the travel, Portugal sounds like fun, not so sure about Budapest but I guess you never know till you get there. Enjoy! And we are so proud of you for finding the strengh to get back into the game.
big hugs!
Val
xx
queenvalerie
Yes i have seen post where i am sure they are still refering to you. It is totaly out of order and has sickened me.
Well, nevermind, Budapest awaits you....
tasty6six6
Sounds great. Wish you could pack me in your suitcase!
BeckyK
congrats my friend.. that is wonderful news.. you deserve it..
meandthebeast
come back safe and sound.
Blessings and peace from LaVivre
LaVivre
Fair play to you for finding the strength to rise above this xxx Fantastic news about work and you should be proud that you re achieving it xxxx Have a good one xxx
MOooser
I'm not sure what went on with the posts, but your attitude about it seems like a healthy response. No one needs to be trashed on here. It can get a bit ridiculous.
Have fun with the travels for work. That is soooo exciting! Take pics so we can see where you go!
Hugs!
amanda28sw