joyfulnoise's Journal

I got a message in my DS message box this morning that set a bad tone for me and I'm tryig to figure out why.  I'd never interacted with this member before and this member said she wanted to be there to support me and went on to tell me how she'd lost a great deal of weight through a vitamin program.  To me this message seemed like a soft sell advertisement.  Like an Avon lady knocking on my door. 

Although I don't mind reading in the community forums about different approaches to weight loss, somehow getting a message from someone who had never talked to me before seemed different.  In a forum, I can choose not to open a thread.  And then I wonder if my sending out messages to chat might be seen as the same thing.  I guess I had hoped to find a community where everyone was trying to lose weight and shared experiences without trying to sell me something.  Even soft sell, is selling.  I just have mixed emotions about it, and today it just put me in a bad mood. 

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  Got a great haircut, bought some new clothes, and took my husband out for his birthday.  He's the best guy in the whole world.  I can sense his mood is lifting too.  He was getting very worried about my health and pain.  Now that I've finally gotten a great fibro doctor and my Lyrica is working so well, I do have a much brighter outlook.  I can feel him relaxing and that makes me overjoyed!  I tried to hide my pain most of the time, but it wasn't always easy nor was it even possible.  Plus I think after knowing each other for over 32 years, a life partner can read right through any false signals.  I am a very blessed person.  I am the person I am because I have a very loving, supportive, handsome, positive, caring, delightful husband and best friend.

Today in the Obesity community a member had a great idea to write down a positive message for every pound lost...  Here's to my 30 pounds off!

1.  I can set a goal and I can move forward to reach it.

2.  I want to be a better scuba diver and move better on the boat.

3.  I want to be a better scuba diver and every 10 pounds I lose means 1 pound off my weight belt.

4.  I want to move better and have better balance.

5.  I want to wear nice sports wear.

6.  I will be able to walk farther and be able to keep up with my husband.

7.  I will be able to bike farther and bike to the food store in the future.

8.  I will lower my chances of diabetes.

9.  I will lower my blood pressure (already off medication!).

10.  The more weight off the less pressure on my muscles.

11.  It will be more comfortable to travel.

12.  I will be able to tighten my seat belt on planes.

13.  Society is nicer to average weight people, that will be nice for me.

14.  My family and friends will enjoy that I'm healthier and worry less about my health.

15.  I no longer am embarrassed stepping onto a scale at the doctor's office.

16.  I am no longer ashamed to tell my husband how much I weigh.

17.  My husband and I are working together in my goal to lose weight.

18.  I enjoy the compliments my husband makes, not just about weight loss, but all compliments.

19.  I no longer am overwhelmed by a need to eat sweets.

20.  I like to exercise, even on days when I'm in full fibro flare, I'm slower, but I'm doing it.

21.  My wetsuit fits much better, I went down a size in my surf suit.

22.  I picked out 2 shirts for my next 10 pound loss as a goal.

23.  I am working more and looking forward to working more.

24.  I can put together meals without too much thought now, good foods are just part of my automatic thinking now.  Got that protein, carb, fat thing down!  I know my portions.

25.  I have more good days than bad days.  More positive in general.

26.  I'm gardening again (that might be that the weather is cooling too).

27.  I'm proud of my journaling.

28.  My bras fit better!!!!!  And wearing them improves my shape and profile.

29.  I'm wearing make up when I go out.  I am more aware of how I look for myself not others.

30.  I do have more energy.  I haven't had a day where I watch DVDs in weeks.

More to come.....

Some may know that I've been trying to schedule chats for the wonderful Obesity Chatroom that DD helped create for our Obesity community.  I know it's never easy to schedule things like this and really don't mind giving the time to help out and get our community involved.  However, my chat last night did bother me alittle.  Here's what I wrote to someone who didn't make it.  I'm not upset with this person at all, but it did get me thinking about time I spend here at DS.  I'm a member just like everyone else.  I know that some members need more support than others and everyone loves a friend when they are feeling down. 

I only get the positive from DS because I'm blessed with a wonderful husband who is my support.  Plus I am intelligent and do try to figure out my own ways of dealing with life.  But I made a mistake mistake in scheduling the chat for Sept. 5th.  By the time I figured it out, it was too late for me to cancel it.  I would have felt bad since a few people said they were coming.  Here's my response:

..."It was interesting, it was my husband's birthday yesterday.  I thought it was today because I just wasn't watching the calendar.  I took him out to dinner and then said, I have to get back for a chat I scheduled by mistake.  He said, just cancel it.  I just couldn't do that because I had promised and made a commitment to do something.  That's just who I am.  But I felt terrible, my husband should always come first.  I honestly don't think I'll be scheduling any more chats, but the room will always be there!"