Pennyphone's Journal

It seems like there is no reason to wake up this week. Going to work is usually nice and sometimes even fun, but today I didn't want to get up.

Last week I was up at 7am every morning making breakfast in bed for my kid, now, there is this dread of waking up to nothingness.

I'm having trouble concentrating on my job. I can't seem to think. All I think about is spending time with my son and being a mom. Working for this non profit is cool except it's all about children and mine is so far away.

Somtimes I feel a manic episode lurking in the back of my mind.  Trying to terrify me into remembering the last hospital visits and wondering if there will be anymore in the future. God, I pray not.

It's hard to be a working girl with bi-polar, you just can't put it in a drawer at your desk and act like it's not there til time to get off work. My boss keeps piling on the work I missed last week to be with Max. I'm just not sure I can do this for an extended period of time.