IagoRule's Journal

Journal Entry for March 13, 2007 Mood

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Well, it's coming up on four months (Thursday). This whole week has been a replay of his last two days, two hours of his life. We've been together for 10 years and you'd think I'd concentrate on one of those moments.

I sometimes get afraid that if I stop greiving it would mean that I'm okay with him being gone. I'm sure a therapist would have a field day analyzing that comment. I never imagined how sad I am without him. I just wish I could have helped him with the fear he had when we left for that last trip to the hospital. He wanted to touch the grass before we left.

I know that I've done everything he wished. He'd be the first to tell you he wasn't a saint, but I'll make sure to let everyone know that he was pert near perfect to me.

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Comments

I feel for you my dear friend. I know the feeling it seems that the more time that passes the more we seem to mis them. I don't think we ever really stop grieving. I think in time maybe we will learn to live with the hand that we all have been dealt. But missing our loves I don't think we will ever stop missing them. your love left you on 11/15 and that was the day that I took my love off the ventilator and brought him home to live out his last days. He left me on 11/20 and took his last breath ar 6:56 pm. Know that I feel for you and that we are all in this together. Love Norma

normag
You're never going to be okay abut his death but you've got to let yourself consider the possibility of being okay with your life at some point. That's not a betrayal of what you had and I can't believe he would not want that for you. I can't imagine how incredibly difficult it would be to lose the love of your life, but you've shown a lot of strength and courage. Thanks for sharing.

Creidance