sophie09's Journal

Journal Entry for July 22, 2008 Mood

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

I guess I should update. Let's take one things at a time:

Working Out - Taking this week off for the most part. I haven't been to the gym since Saturday and so far I'm okay with it. Normally I get super depressed when not working out, but I haven't noticed a difference.

Sleeping - If sleeping were in the Olympics, I'd be in the race. I'm sleeping around 12 or more hours a day. I'm sleeping in until noon or later and not getting to bed until 2 am at the earliest. This morning was more around 4 am. I didn't get up until 2 pm today so I'm sure I'll be up even later tonight.

PTSD - Same or a little worse. I've been having nightmares lately. They're not horrible, but they're there none the less.

Depression - See sleeping. I'm sure it's related. I normally don't sleep for so long. Oh well. Nothing to do while I'm awake really. I haven't seriously thought about suicide in a while so I guess that's an improvement.

Eating - Eating plenty. Normally around 2500-3100 calories a day. Weight is stable, not gaining or losing, so I obviously need it.

My Aunt - She has a brain aneurysm, gallstones, a blood clot in her leg, and needs stints in her heart. A blood clot is what killed my grandma when I was 6, it went to her heart and she died.

My aunt has no money. She said she has $2 in her checking account and the bills are coming in. Her credit cards are just about maxed out as well. She hasn't been getting any medications except what the doctor can give her through "samples" he gets.

She has applied for disability through Social Security, welfare assistance for the bills, worker's compensation for the time she hasn't been able to work (well over a month now) and her doctor is working on getting her some medical insurance so they can operate on her brain and heart.

Me - Still alive. When I go home (Friday) I will be working at my college's bookstore. I have no idea how many hours it will be per day. I would LOVE for it to be full time as I need the money to pay the bills and for medication until/if my aunt gets assistance. If it's not enough hours, I'll look for a second job near my house.

I think that about covers it.

Hug sophie09

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Comments

Gosh, I can't imagine how stressed you must feel from everything that's been going on lately. I'm glad to see you journaled about it, though. I really hope everything turns out to be okay with your aunt. I'll keep her in my prayers. You are such a generous person to be willing to work two jobs just to support your aunt's medical bills. That's beyond caring.
I hope you feel better soon and this depression and crazy sleeping schedule goes away soon.

Actress01
Thats too bad about ur aunt.
May God help her out in this time of need.
I hear ya on the sleepin...I think it can be part of depression cause all I wanna do is sleep and stay in my bedroom for the most part.
Here for ya if u wanna talk.
Hug

SarahLynn
Big hug for you throughout all of this. Prayers for your aunt too. XO

Gabrador
sounds like ur body was in need of this time off...

missyS
Hopefully if you sleep that much, you feel rested. If you still feel fatigued, then it's probrably related or you're getting too much.

Hope things start to turn around soon.

pixie0413