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Do you ever feel like your about to lose it all? I do. My grandmother is losing a battle against alzheimers. She is unable to eat or drink. My parents are on their way down to south Georgia where she is at. So, I'm about to lose her. I'd like to go with them, but I can't with three kids. I'm also about to lose my house, my car, I feel like I'm losing my husband. If you can call him a husband anymore. He's never home. He's not home now when I need him and he doesn't help out with bills. I've lost so much. Why does God keep taking things away from me? I just don't know how much more I can take. If I'm being tested, I hope this is my final test. This is just too much stress. I'm trying to keep it together for my kids. But it's really hard. What do I tell them when we don't have a place to live or our van gets taken away. I keep telling myself I'll get through this and tomorrow will be a better day. But it seems like the next day is not any better than the last.
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It's been a while since I last wrote an update. My husband has moved back home. He sleeps on the couch. The divorce is still on; however, he has not been served. He wants to put the divorce on hold. In the meantime, we are both struggling financially. I feel like I have basically been trying to support my three kids all by myself. He still goes out with friends. He says he needs that right now, that he is getting old (he's forty) and needs an outlet. He still claims that the other woman and him were and are only friends. And his new set of friends are friends with this other woman. He takes the kids to these family friendly functions that these friends have, but I get left at home. His excuse is that since they are friends with this other woman, he didn't think I would want to be around them. These people don't even know me and they have predeveloped ideas about me. Who knows what they think of me? The only thing I did that may have upset his friends is I sent each one on his myspace page an email letting them know that I am my husband's wife and that he is married (he had single on his myspace page). I got ugly emails back and responses like had a good time with you last night Dennis ;), etc. I don't get it. What have I done to them? What does he say about me? I really bugs me. It hurts to know there are people out there that are mean and shallow. Right now I am just concentrating on keeping things normal for the kids. They love having their daddy at home, when he's there.
Comments
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Stability is important but your happiness is as well. Try to keep that in mind. You need to be happy to be healthy. Sending hugs your way.
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I AGREE WITH ANGELBABIES, YOU NEED TO BE HAPPY TO BE HEALTHY, BUT I ALSO SEE THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE FOR YOU KIDS, I CAN ONLY RESPECT THAT!! THE EASY THING TO DO IS LEAVE, YOU ARE A VERY SPECIAL LADY & GOOD THINGS WILL COME TO YOU!! I AM SO SORRY FOR THE HURT YOUR HAVING TO ENDURE!! SENDING SPECIAL PRAYERS & LOTS OF LOVE YOUR WAY!! (((BIG HUGS))) Love, Theresa
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I am so sorry to hear of what you are going through. It sounds to me like he wants his cake and eat it too. You need to take care of you and when you do that it will be easier to take care of your children. Your husband sounds selfish and very immature. If he is struggling financially how can he afford to go out? I would bet nickles to dollars that his "friends" are more than just "friends". I know they love haveing their daddy home but really you are teaching them that it is okay to live this way...And do you really believe it is???? I hope I didnt offend you I am concerned and want you to know how I see the picture you have painted. Much Love to you.....CINDY
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Gosh I am so sorry to hear all this - know the feeling and never in a million years I want this on anyone, especially not my friends... well wish there is something I can do but know I am here if you need someone to chat or talk to or just to lend an ear... yes I agree with you there too, when all the shiites keep piling up, never seems like there is an ending and ever day is only a repeat of the previous... BUT I also know to always have faith and believe in all we hold dear to our hearts, always... the only thing we CAN do at times. Here for you, hugs!
dsmonkey
I am sorry to hear about your grandmother. I remember what it was like when I lost mine. It was absolutely devastating. I am sorry about everything else going too. Hang in there and know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
lvnikita
I am going through some of the same financial problems too. Try to think positive. I know that is hard to do. But really try to push the bad thoughts our of your head. I am sorry to hear about your grandmother. Hang in there for you. You are strong.
jewelsgem2
I too just recently lost my granny. Bless her heart she was 97 years old. She was so ready to go home and be with Jesus...I find solice in that and I kn ow she is no longer suffering.....I hate to hear the your "husband " isnt helping out with your situation. Why doesnt he?????I tell you something God knows what we can handle, we dont. So just trust that even if it is a test, you will pass it!!!!!!Much Love to you >>>>> CINDY
cancerfree50
I wish I had a magic wand to "fix"it all for you. It does seem like sometimes when we are hurting things are all piling up around us. You are brave to keep coming here looking for a bit of strength to keep going. Be kind to yourself in someway.
missingisabelle
I'M SO SORRY HONEY FOR THE PAIN & SUFFERING YOUR HAVING TO ENDURE!!!! KEEP PRAYING SWEETIE & I'LL BE PRAYING FOR YOU TOO!!! WE ALL ARE FACING SOME TYPE OF FINANCIAL BURDEN, WE JUST HAVE TO KEEP FAITH IN GOD THAT HE'S GOING TO WALK US THROUGH THE ROUGH PATCHES!! KEEPING YOU IN MY THOUGHTS & PRAYER'S!!! BIG HUGS, LOVE, THERESA
Theresa42266