canukmom's Journal

It has been awhile since I have written anything. Being home here I have been kinda busy. Although this website is great, sometimes I don't want to log on because it reminds me about what happened. Not that I could forget, but sometimes I am scared that i will forget. I have really only talked about this with people here on the website. And honestly I have not even said outloud to anyone that I miscarried, using the word miscarried. Not that I have told anyone really. I just have not talked about it , even though so many people have asked me when we are having another one. I am not liking that people ask me that , but they don't know. I just kinda make jokes about it. Our son just turned 2 and this pregnancy we lost was perfect timing because our kids would be 2 and a half years apart and being born in July means that we would be able to come back to Canada for christmas next year. My mind goes into overdrive all the time, but I can't change what has happened. Lately I have not been up woth my bible reading or praying and I have felt really guilty about it. I am glad I feel guilty because it I did not , then my conscience would not care, but I care. Anyway off for the night.