joyluckclub's Journal

Okay, this is very shallow of me, but, here it goes.

I am thankful that after my diagnosis, I was able to access help in dealing with HIV.  The intensive counseling helped me accelerate the progress I was making with my mental health issues.

Consequently, I had to find a new psychiatrist.  My HIV support counselor and my former psychiatrist (she closed her practice to focus on her children.....a good example) recommended a psychiatrist that was just a year older than me (33).  I expected to look at a slim, reserved guy with glasses.

Boy, was I wrong!

MY NEW PSYCHIATRIST IS HOT!  HE IS TALL, HAZEL EYES, HAIR LIKE A ABOCROMBIE AND FITCH MODEL, AND HAS A GREAT BEDSIDE MANNER!  

LOL

OMG!

I had a hard time concentrating.  I kept on thinking, WOW, you are HOT!

Then, my better mind came back and said.  Since you like him, keep it "professional"

I don't want to see him walking his dog, shopping, out with friends.....don't even want to know where his car is out in the parking lot!

Boundaries......

School is going well.  The three weeks vacation I had enabled me to renovate my office, settle some debts, sleep, and enjoy spending time with my "family of choice".

I now know I want to work in the non profit, government, or academic arena.  Corporate america is not for me.

I'm still beating myself up about my HIV diagnosis.  My 1st therapist (I have a total of three....seems like overkill from the outside, but its been very helpful) says, "Look at it this way.....you lived.....its like catching a cold......you were exposed....because you breathed........you can't beat yourself up for living.....bad things happen to good people everyday....."

I love my new office.  The clutter is gone!  It is a nice, comfortable place to concentrate on school work and personal finance/social issues.