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I am very hurt and sad, because my boyfriend of 10 months just broke up with me. He has had a lot of distrust and hurt in his life regarding relationships with women, and unfortunately he has projected this onto me. He constantly accuses me of cheating on him. This is the farthest thing from the truth.
The truth is that I have always been faithful to him. I have stood by this man through all kinds of extremely difficult situations, and I have loved and cared for him in ways that no one in his entire life has before.
But because of his own insecurities he has pushed me away.
I have come to the conclusion that he is not able to accept and embrace the love I have for him.
This makes me sad. Because if he would have let me , I could have been the one woman to show him what true, unconditional, trusting love was like.
I wanted so much for him to finally feel the happiness and comfort of that feeling that comes with trusting and loving with all your heart.
I could have been the woman to do that for him.
But he wouldn't let me. :(
Comments
I am so happy!! I finally finished nursing school , and while I was doing my internship working at the hospital, I met an amazing guy. His name is Derrick, he is 32 and funny as hell. he makes me laugh ALL the time... he is really nice and really cute!! He treats me and my kids really good, and he is very affectionate. He plays guitar really good, and he is giving Cameron guitar lessons. Cameron is improving, but he is still having trouble with bladder function. He has a lot of leg pain in his right leg too. Katie is doing good too. she has a nice boyfriend that makes her feel special, and she is doing well in school.
I am really happy with where my life is going right now.
Carrie
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THats soooooooooo wonderfulllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!
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Girly, it is just raining men out there. I need to come for a visit. You are just a cutie pie and they can't resist your charm. I am so happy for you and now I know why we haven't connected on the phone you are high on new love and new adventure. Call me when you can, would love to hear about him. Maybe I should go back to school and find a guy there, where do you find a honest guy? I am looking and looking lol!!! Happy for you!
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That's great to hear! :)
Another poem that reminds me of Cameron...
> You Have Taught Me
>
> written by
> Anne Maclellan
>
>
> You have taught me patience
> to rejoice in small gains which others take for
> granted. You have taught me tolerance
> to accept that your perspective is different
> and deserves respect.You have taught me courage
> to fight for you when no one else will.
>
> You have taught me endurance to go on when I
> feel I can't any more. You have taught me humility
> to accept when I can't make things better
> but can only be here for you. You have taught
> me to love at a deeper level than I ever
> thought possible
Past Entries
| July 2007 |
Sunday, 7/01
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June 2007 |
Wednesday, 6/27
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Saturday, 6/23
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Friday, 6/22
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Friday, 6/15
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Wednesday, 6/06
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Tuesday, 6/05
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May 2007 |
Tuesday, 5/29
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I have known you for a long time Carrie and the one that that I know for a fact is that you are a VERY loyal person. You and I are alot alike in that sense. I also know that you have been there for "D" when his mom died and even helped him get her buried. You were there for him threw all of that. And if his own insecurities are what's stopping him from having a great life with a great woman and her terrific kids, then it's his loss. From personal experience, I don't know how you do it. I don't think that he realizes how wonderful of a person you really are. It takes alot for a woman to have kids that have special needs just to do day to day things. And God only gives us kids like that for a reason. And we are BOTH grateful for that everyday. And "D" should be too. I don't think how lucky he is to have a woman like you. I know that Bo doesn't. I don't understand why men are like that. And if he won't let you love him, then maybe he's not ready for that. And if he's not, then maybe, as hard as it would be for you, just let him go. You can't force him to stay if he's not ready for the love that you can give him. message me later if ya need anything hon!!! :) heather
hme77
Thanks for your comments Heather. I know he loves me, I just wish he would believe that I love him just as much. When he acts all jealous and accuses me of cheating, all that does is push me away.
Maybe you are right.... maybe he is just not ready for this relationship.
CarrieandCam