TomB's Journal

Want to thank all those who gave me support and advice. Sadly I must say that it's over with my wife. I'm a 206lb man who can benchpress hundreds of pounds and run 7 min miles at the age of 43 and I've been crying like I've never known I can cry for the past 3 hours... Wife and I had a long discussion in the early morning this morning where she revealed more information about the affair. I went to work thereafter and started to process. The information hurt deeply but I was getting through it. I emailed her at work and informed her of this. She responded happily and said she had a burden she needed to get off her shoulders. Of course as soon as I read it my stomach dropped to my feet. Had to go outside to get a hold of myself. Was shaking uncontrollably... What more could she say? Anyway after an hour of agony she emailed me with the information that was burdening her. Turns out that she had another email account with another man and this was going on supposedly before the guy she F)(*. She didn't say how long or the contents of the emails. She said it did not progress beyond the emails. I sincerely doubt that because this guy actually worked at her facility 2 to 3 times a week. Anyway to make a long story short, for those who have gone through multiple person affairs, you know what I feel. That's it. Getting ready to go to a lawyer that I got a free consultation with a few weeks back. Was on the way when she passed me coming home for lunch and she convinced me to come home and talk. I listened to the same old speal that she's telling the truth blah blah blah. Couldn't help it but I was cold. She figured out that I was heading to the lawyers office and grabbed a knife and ran out the door with it. I was screaming, "this is how you communicate". She came back in and we talked and she begged and yada yada yada. Any way, I convinced her not to hurt herself and go back to work. I believe she will hurt herself because she has been banging her head and hitting her chest many times in the past 3 days. After she left, I called her mother, (crying again), and pleaded with her to help her daughter out. She had nobody on her side. Crazy isn't it. To be honest with you, if she killed herself over this shi. I would probably do the same which would leave our youngest child destroyed. So I guess you can say that I called her mother for selfish reasnons. I've run on too long and I'm too tired and the beer that I've had is wearing off. Time to talk to the lawyer. For those of you who still have a chance---keep trying unless you,re ready for a life of lonliness. For those interested, I will check in later to let you know how all this crap went. Maybe it will help you in your decision with your situation.