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Journal Entry for October 16, 2007 Mood
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
SO ....

AF came!... but...

i was actually hopin she would come...

LAST year i got pregnant with Daniel this month so i actually didnt want another due date in June but im really pushin for the next couple of mons to try... any advice?? I feel OK, that dream did bug me out alot... just wish he stuck around to see him laugh cry smile...

Im goin to a pumpkin patch this weekend wit my sister and my nieces and being the patch is right by where daniel is buried we gonna visit him and put pumpkins and sunflowers for him... and since im spanish we celebrate Day of the Dead (dia de los muertes) which is on Nov 1 (all saints day as followed by all souls day on Nov2) i want to visit Daniels grave that day but ill be stuck at work so my dad is gonna go with my mom (my moms bday also). Sux that i cant go... but other than that my mom is getthin worse.. ( she has alzhiemers) thats another thing that hurts me alot... i pray everyday for daniel to watch over my mommy...


RIP Daniel
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Comments

  1. kensmom

    I know what you mean about not wanting another due date the same as his. I had CJ on May 7 and my due date now is May 20th.
    Going to the pumpkin patch sounds like fun. I hope you can enjoy your time with your family. I'm sure Daniel will love the pumpkins and sunflowers. And he is watching over you every day.


    kensmom

  2. NicOG

    I am hoping to get pregnant this month because next month is when my son was conceived. I don't want the same, or around the same, due date again. I have a bad feeling though that I didn't get pregnant this month. I'll know by the end of next week.
    Clearblue easy ovulation kits are the best. They have worked really well for everyone I know who has used them. I used it this month. I am just upset because with my fiance and I on such different work schedules, we were a liitle late on the best day to conceive.
    Good luck to you! And I am sure that Daniel is watching over his grandma right now. Hugs!


    NicOG

  3. AngelofaHustler

    I can't have anymore children. I have 2 beautiful little girls, ages 6 and 5, and my youngest was born with alot of health problems. Just last month she had open-heart surgery and it was pure hell seeing her hooked up to all those machines and tubes. I still feel like I'm reliving that nightmare because it wasn't just her surgery I had to face that week. I had to deal with my children's father being the biggest asshole on this earth trying to get me kicked out of the hospital for no reason just because he didn't want me there, and then I found out my oldest daughter was raped and molested by her stepbrothers. I didn't think I could get any lower. My daughters are doing much better now, but they're in foster care because the county doesn't know if I can handle taking care of them with my disorders. It's hell only seeing them once a week for one hour and the court proceedings just never seem to end. But I know my girls would never want me to give up because I'm all they have since their father's rights were terminated, so I can't give up, and neither can you. I know Daniel would want you to keep going on, as hard as it is. Yes, I hate crying all the time, too. But just remember...the sun does come out sometimes.


    AngelofaHustler

  4. gloriad

    ((hugs))


    gloriad

  5. CDLT

    I'm keeping you and your family in my prayers. Were trying to, I wonder if there are secrets we are missing about trying for a baby? Hugs your way.


    CDLT

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