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still feel down... i dont know if i'll ever be happy. another friend is pregnant...after tryin for only a month...its not fair. that should be me. maybe i'ma terrible person and thats why this is happening to me...i just dont know.
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Yet another friend has told me she is pregnant...almost 5 months. I can't believe i never really noticed it before now. The worst part is that we work together so i have to see her often which is a constant reminder to me of what could have been or SHOULD have been. I feel like a bad person and the guilt haunts me because I want to be happy for her but at the same time i wish that it were me. I don' t know what to do anymore...do i give up? should i? At this point i don't know...i don't want to but i wish i didn't have to be disappointed any more.
Past Entries
| January 2008 |
Wednesday, 1/23
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Wednesday, 1/23
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Friday, 1/18
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Thursday, 1/17
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Wednesday, 1/16
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May 2007 |
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Friday, 5/25
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Wednesday, 5/23
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Goal Updated
You are not a terrible person and you are not being punished for anything. I know how alone and lonely this feels but know that you are now alone. We will all get through this. We will all have our time. Some of us will just have to wait longer than others. And we will have a connection with our children that women who don't have to try don't have. We will have a true appreciation for the miracle that they are. Hang in there and lots of baby dust to you.
connersmommy
Typo-should say that you are not alone, not that you are now alone. Sorry.
connersmommy