KaT1307's Journal

Put the blade back in my hand, my world is in your control. kill me or cut me. that your choice. end my life, slit my throat. i'm sick of this shit, shitty pain and love. i hate the addiction, to pain.

the pain seems unbearable,

and the cutting seems to heal,

but there's a time when you cant cut deep enough,

to heal the pain away.

 to start eating again,

would be to gain weight.

and if i gained weight...

i'd surely cut more. i'm so confused, and caught, in a storm of myself,

 like a cat in a tree,

i cant get out.

i lay in my bed,

 all alone and shiviring cold.

the razor, my only friend,

who feels my pain,

 yet inflicts it too.

upon my bed, i cry alone,

 the tears roll down my face,

 leaving black streaks from mascara.

 sobbing hopelossly at a love long lost.

and cutting so fast and deep and hard,

that i lose track of time.

soon its time for me to pass out, from the loss of blood,

and not eating for days.

 slowly as i come to,

and face the new world,

i mutter " i love you & always will"

 and take that blade one more time,

and carve your name, the last cut in my life.

off to hell