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Emotional Immaturity with maturity beside it
LoveLove is need. Demands affection and love but avoids any sign of weakness. Has difficulty showing and accepting love.Love is sharing. Fosters a sense of security which allows vulnerability and strength. Can express love and accept expressions of love. EmotionsCannot handle frustration or criticism; jealous, unwilling to forgive, fluctuating moods. Temper tantrums. Fears change.Uses emotions as energy sources. When frustrated, sets goals and seeks solutions.RealityAvoids and denies money and relationship problems which demand integrity. Seeks people to blame.Confronts and analyzes problems promptly. Seeks many solutions and chooses the best. Accepts responsibility.Give & TakeMay be willing to give, but not take; or willing to take, but not give.Helps enhance the quality of life of beloved people. Accepts help from others.FeedbackDoes not learn from experience. Good or bad experiences are caused by luck, or fate. Little personal responsibility.Life is a learning experience. Accepts responsibility and learns from feedback. Looks for opportunities. Moves on.StressAvoids reality, pessimistic, angry, attacks people when frustrated. Often anxious. Relaxed and confident in their ability to plan and achieve what they want.RelatingDependent, easily influenced, indecisive, or impulsive. Avoids responsibility for own actions or deficiencies. Sensitive to criticism, but insensitive to others' feelings.Independent, team-worker or manager as required. Cooperative. Experiences empathy, and compassion. A good friend, partner, parent and teamworker.
I am frustrated at the moment because my relationship with my best friend who lives 200 miles away from me is in distress. She can be very laid back about contacting her friends and if she's tired she doesn't pick up the phone and talk to anyone. It has always been this way since we were very young and i confronted her this week because it was upsetting me and she apologised and said it was no excuse to not call me if shes just tired especially as she knew i wanted to talk to her about something in particular. Well yesterday we arranged to talk finally and she didn't pick up because she left her phone in the other room apparently and now i am just cross and can't talk to her as i am too upset. When i say she always done this i mean she has upset other close friends of ours by not responding to them or answering calls and i always stick up for her saying she goes quiet when things are not too happy with her but now i just feel she is being selfish and lazy and that hurts.
In the chart above is states how to deal with stress when you are emotionally mature which has pissed me off even more because it says i should be relaxed and confident in times of stress and feel capable of getting what i want. Can anyone tell me that when they are upset or stressed that they behave in this way. Ideals are not helpful with trying to become more emotionally mature, i need reality and coping mechanisms which right now is to surrender this feeling to God and to ask him to let me accept i am powerless over this feeling and that i am not to try and control it but to breath slowly through it which i'm doing as i write this and to feel Gods love and spirit close by and to be grateful so grateful for that. I feel a bit calmer now. Thank you for being there aMEN
UPDATED GOALS
Create my self esteem
Progress 50%
Encouragements: 0
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Comments
Thanks for sharing, I hope you can work out your feelings about you friend. Are you letting her upset you? You might want to change your reactions, and not try to get her to change hers unless she wants to change. I'm suggesting you're the one with the problem, she seems to be fine with her behavior. Forgive and accept her, and then do the same to yourself? Does that help?
As far as the stress goes, I don't know what planet those people live on that they can shut off the stress like they suggest, but I have a difficult time with it too LOL. Maybe it just takes practice. Something to look forward to.
Hope you feel better soon.
Richeart