lauriestark’s Profile

About Me

Hi, i am 44 last week...Had a birthday. i live in Australia now, i grew up in California and lived there my whole life. The last 18 months have been the hardest and most devastating that i still do not beleive it has happened. i lost my Grandmother on August 8th 2005...Then three months later My Mom (who had been in a long term care facility for 15 years) Died while I was holding her hand watching TV. My older sister a week after my mom passed away was complaining of a swollen foot, and went to the hospital...She passed away 4 months later...I decided to move from california to Sydney Australia and while I was here my cousin, he was 45 passed away from a heart attack. I was home this last December 2006 visiting my dad and he took me to the airport on December 24th to fly back to Australia when i got a phone call from my 19 year old daughter that he died in his sleep at home on december 30th, just 6 days after I left. I dont know how to even start to think to try to heal from all this...I am not even sure if i ever will. But I know I need someone to talk to. I dont know what to do or what to say...I rarely even know what to think anymore. I cry every day when im alone. I try to talk to my mom all the time and ask her to help me get through this, but I am lost and feel alone. I have a little sister and a brother but we do not talk. I dont know where to start so i hope someone can help me somehow.

Interests

I love to go to Museums because I love history, but most of all I love to travel and take day trips or just drive or go on the FerryBoats. I'm not good at gardening or things of that nature, but I love a lot of plants and gardens. I go to the beach alot when the weather is warm because I love watching the waves and the sea air smell of the Ocean.