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I don’t write as much on here. I guess that means that my life is just steering its course. I have been doing the usual.. Working, chatting with Shawnee, but there have been some new girls coming into my life. I have been meeting some very beautiful women at my work lately. One of them I have been seeing and talking to almost every day. I don’t know what is going to become of it because I am still working things out with Shawnee.
It seems like every time I do meet a new girl, it just confirm that my relationship with Shawnee is better. Even thou I am not totally happy with Shawnee all the time, over all she is there for me when I need her. Recently I got in a discussion with her over her going to bed without letting me know she was. I was waiting that night to talk to her, and she seemed to ignore me and just faded away. I felt neglected and I told her how I felt. I also told her it wasn’t the first time that I have felt that way.
Something I noticed about our relationship, verse other girls that I know. Shawnee doesn’t seem to show affection and express any “lovey” stuff with me. I see how other girls treat their guys and I don’t get that. If anything, I am the one that does that for her. It seems backwards. This new girl I met is already showing me affection, but her keeping in contact with me is worse than Shawnee’s. It makes me think if I really want to get involved with someone that leaves me feeling like I am not that important. I know I deserve better.
So, Shawnee and I had a big falling out, and out of that she really convinced me how important I am to her. She showed me that I do mean a lot to her. What I saw was her willingness to fight to keep us a couple. It brought tears to my eyes to hear her express how much she values me in her life. So, as it stands, we are still going strong. I am looking forward to seeing her this next week for the 4th and she says she is looking forward to it too. I will keep you all posted if anything new develops.
BIG Hugs to all~!!
~Eric
