I have just started talking about the rape recently. My friends have been giving me a hard time about not leaving the house enough but Im scared. I go to school in the middle of the day and even there Im thinking "Am I going to get attacked?" I've realized how much we take advantage of the small things we do in life. For example, changing from pjs to regular clothes. I high five myself when I feel comfortable in clothes that show my figure. It is so hard to feel attractive yet feel safe anymore. I keep hearing from people it will get better. But its not, the nightmares are worse, I cant sleep. Im afraid of him coming back to the home I still live in. Any thoughts?
It is okay to be scared, you were violated in a place where you should feel the safest, your home. The nightmares will continue, and there will be a scent, movement, something that will make you remember that night. Try to tell yourself that you are a survivor and nobody is going to hurt you again. Meet a psychotherapist that you like, join support groups. It will be a battle that you will win, but it will take a while before you conquer your fear. Just remember you have control on how you handle your future. Good luck and I am praying for you.
lilstacy