edgy's Journal

this is sent out to you to read haylie
monday she want ten for green i said no ,complained and called me names tuesday her frriend called wanted to borrow twenty she would get half of green,monday i gave into her and tuesday i did also so not to hear same words and put downs she came home tuesday and accused me of talking to her daughter on phone then it went crazy and she accused me of having a thing with her best friend,and told me to leave went to leave grabbed fishing rod she broke it reel on table then hit me in chest w hand then i tgot worse and you said i have to make decission to be happy it was made for me,she chased me into the hallway with rod and beat me with it shwe was trying to hit me in the head w it and i put my arm up for protection and got hit in the hand and in the elbow i had to go to the hospital to check out elbow very swollen,,nothing broken thank god.
called from payphone then 2 hours later she showed up and the first thing she said was what did i tell them she said she didnt want to go to jail put me in er and she worries bout goimg to jail
i would not do that despite my feelings,then she wanted to talk i said things are getting way out of hand she said people put thoughts in her head and she gets carried away,the only one putting thoughts in her head is her,yet she wants to blame others,i cant take it anymore.
i flat out asked her what if she had a knife in her hands at that point,it has escalade from slapping me to slapping and hitting with hands to trying to hit me in the head w fishing rod,which got me in the hand and elbow,and a slight hit on the noggin,some out there will find the humor in this i am glad i wasnt going hunting ye a sense of humor even if dark.i cant take anymore,and haylie i dont know if or when i can contact you again,but i will try.
i went out to drink not a good chose but i am faced w being alone no home no girl and no one but you if i can find a way to contact you out side of here,cause i cant take anymore abuse.
you are a good soul and i wish you well.i read your last entry about losing your mom i cant imagine such a thing,moms are the most important things in the world,but you should count your blessings that you have the chance to make the rest of her days comfortable and being there for her to the end.the night before my brother past away my sister and mother had a good night w him they shaved him bathed him and talked to him for most of the night and they said it was great despite the ending.i believe that god gives us these moments to cherish on purpose so that we will never forget what those who have past have left for us to remember the good ,not so good and the lessons that they have given us,which we most recall after they have past.
god is ,and has given you the strength to fullfil this path which he has chosen for you it will make you stronger and wiser so that you too can pass this belief onto others.
i dont go to church but that doesnt mean i dont believe,each time i catch a fish i say thank you to ti and to god for making it possible.
h i dont know when i can write again,due to these circumstances but i will asap,just now writing this has made me feel all that much better especially if i know you will see it and respond to it with insight and wisdom,wish me well,as i wish you all the best
edgy aka vince