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Last night was a good night. The first time seeing this therapist, and already seeing progress. Yup, that good. We went over her history and issues, and all that, and she opened up. We talked, we cried, we hugged. Then we went out to celebrate. Even this morning, we had a disagreement, but we talked through it and it worked out well. It is like a huge mountain of stress got taken off her shoulders. Finally a place she can trust to talk to me and the counselor about things. I know there will be a lot more bumps ahead, but after last night I'm extremely optimistic. I'm planning a great surprise for her next sunday! I'm excited.
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my body with ms? my mind from this stuff? my hearts already broken.
Another horrible night. Why? Because her bed time is 9:30 and that's not fair. Well, now it's going to be 9pm after the huge fit that was thrown. The only reason why she stopped trashing her room, the hall and the stairs is because she tried to hit something and a nail was sticking out so it jabbed her in the palm, an ut oh, real pain. yeah. i almost drove her back to the hospital and dropped her off and told them to keep her.
I've taken her phone, gameboy, ethernet card, and the gum she stole. She snuck in my room tonight to find the phone to tell this boy to get on aim messenger. I guess I better get her to the gyno if she's going to start pulling crap with boys now too.
I also found out counseling is going to be just about impossible now too. My copay is 50% of the company's approved amount. WTF am I paying $450 a month in insurance for? Ok the insurance is great for reg docs & hospital and all that.. forget mental health though. i guess it's time to call up dr k. and have her drugged.
I prepared for the worst, hoped for the best. Well the worst is worse than I thought it could be.
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sorry hon...it is like they go to bed one nite the same sweet little kids we have..smile..then they wake up the next morning the spawn of satan and stay that way for the next four years...rofl..
sigh... we are still working through round three...but mine are all boys...i had a foster daughter through the ages of 14-18 ..that was enough for me..smile.
hang in there hon....there is light at the end of the tunnel...
luv
heather
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I thought they just passed a law that said therapy ie, mental therapy was to be covered the same. You better call your insurance provider and find out. I swear they were just talking about it on Bonnie Hunt. You could check out her website, if you can get it to connect. It's www.bonniehunt.com\ ,yesterday one of her guests had clinical depression and was talking about how the law had passed. Good luck, I know it sucks to have to deal with a teenager.
Peace~
When I got pregnant at 19, I wasn't really sure what being a parent was all about. I knew that I had enough love and determination to do my best and to find the resources necessary to become the best parent I could be. I'm pretty good with kids, they respond to me very well. I've babysat since I was 12 and always took care of the family. Trying to be the best parent I could be, I took classes, enrolled in a parenting program and daycare, met with other moms and single parents. Soaked up all the info.
Now I sit here with a 13 year old and I look back and I know I made some mistakes - I left her at my mom's too much while I was working and going to college. Before she was 4 I moved around a bit too much. I did do the best I could, and as I learned things, I did better. I'm still learning and still trying to better myself as a parent and as a person.
Right now I'm looking at this a few different ways. I need to make sure she has all the basic life skills in the next 3 years so she can become a capable member of society. I need to give her the tools to be able to have her own place, to function on her own.
I feel like I'm failing. I expect her to pass all her classes, be somewhat respectful, do a few chores, and just have fun being a kid. It's not that difficult. I'm missing something, I don't know what. I'm going to go back to the more chores, more control over her actions, less fun family time. maybe I became too lax. things just seemed to be flowin gin our family, going the right direction. I missed something.
I'm back at square one. Looking at it positively, at least I know what's possible, and have additional tools from the last round.. But man am I tired. Next year I am so taking a vacation. Just me and the BF. My mom can come watch her and the dog.
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You have to remember too, that she is now becoming a woman with all the harmones that make teenagers crazy and do really dumb things. This too is part of the problem. Most teens don't do what they're suppose to do and they lie to their parents because they're too dumb at this point to really know better. I hope things work out. I think there are some good books about coping with teens on Amazons list. Also check out Oprah's list too. She had someone on once that told how to deal with teens. Good luck.
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oh hon..clamity is so right on this one..smile..i had my first son at 19...smile...and yep made mistakes along the way..we have to so that they can improve you know..otherwise what the hell will they tell a therapist in 20 years..grin..
i remember when my middle one who is 21 now...was about 9 at the time..screamed at me that he hated me in the middle of a busy mall...grin..i dont even know were it came from...lol..
i looked at him..and told him good that meant i was doing my job as a parent properly..but it was okay becuase i still loved him...lol...people were laughing and a few started clapping..rofl...
and my dear..sigh..you have not lost a thing with your daughter..you are im afriad..entering puberty..grin..
best peice of advice i will ever give you i promise..call mom..ask her simply..what was i like in puberty and how did you handle it..rofl..
i promise by the time she has you off the phone you will be laughing and have a better grasp of the whole process...but also that in 5 years you will be calling your mother back and saying...just wanted to call and say sorry..rofl...
i did that with my mother..rofl...by the time i had the first one through puberty..i knew what it was going to be like..grin..i sent my mom flowers with an apolgy note...lol....
im on my last round now...15 and going strong..sigh..
luv
heather
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Fantastic Tootie! Glad you have some stress relief! Mark
MrMark
See I told you, find a therapis she likes and the whole world eases up. Thank goodness, huh? I'm so happy for you. Take care and be well.
Peace~
Calamitybb
that is great news hon..smile...it is so important to keep the lines of communication open with them..sigh..even if sometimes we hear things we wish we did not want to ...or are placed on the end of a coversation we dont want to be..grin...it is a nice feeling to know that your kids can come to you with anything and trust you to help them...and i think that is what you want and are looking for with your girl..smile....your doing a great job by the way..smile..alot of parents just give up during this stage...but your not..smile....you are going the distance for her and for you...you should be so proud of yourself as a parent...your a great mom
luv
heather
heather1