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Why did I let my ex boyfriend back into my life. Now I am in more pain than ever, having experienced a brief moment of happiness and freedom. If I end it for good will I be happy again? He made it so difficult yesterday, so many promises to change. Yes, I want what he's talking about- that true love, a husband, family, living together, meeting the family, being made happy. but I feel like I am selling my soul for a lie. I can not in good conscience talk to my ex when I may have met my true match. I don't know. I need more time. why won't he give me more time. and in the mean time,
I have made my own bed, now I have to lay in it. : I told him I needed a break, I started dating again only a week afterward. This is how I beat myself up. Plus it has been such a long two weeks with the others in my life. my depression has been creeping in and I've been fighting it only to be knocked so low today. and I admit, I do not have hope for tonight. I do not believe I will be happy if I call him to end it, I do not believe I will be happy if I don't call and continue to sit and put it off, I do not believe I will be happy if I see him...but I am not sure I have the strength to do what I need to do- either not call, not show up, call and say I'm not showing up, hang up, don't return calls. how can I do that after what he said? this is a nightmare.
Comments
GAWWWDDD WHY CAN'T IT BE FRIDAY!!!!! OR AT LEAST 5 O CLOCK
So this guy from the internet sounds like a lesbian. but not to be judgemental I agreed to talk and see if we could be friends. then he plays phone games where he calls me late at night then doesn't return my calls in the morning.
My #1 problem with my last boyfriend was this. I work fulltime. I am on a bed at 10pm schedule. That is my #1 criteria for my new boyfriend. I told him this. He pretends like he doesn't hear. He says 'it's not a big deal'. He asks me 'what do I mean by that' when I have made it PERFECTLY CLEAR
I HATE HIM. hope he doesn't call me.
Then I meet him and he is not that cute at all. But he still pretends like *I* am the one that started the schedule problem. So I said "SEE YA"
So yay me. That is progress. It was stressful b/c I am not assertive by nature. BUT I DID IT!!!
ugghhh.... I hope the others are better. PLEASE GOD let them be better. FOR SANITY'S SAKE let them be better.
UPDATED GOALS
Be Assertive
Progress 45%
Encouragements: 1
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Make Good Friends
Progress 15%
Encouragements: 1
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Hey! So proud of you! :) Good you dumped that because it can only get worse. If he was down right good looking you might have compromised that relationship and been unhappy in the long run. Just keep that attitude for the good looking guy too. Misery runs deep. I think his behavior is all about not having a woman tell him what to do. He heard you very well!
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wtg... NO MORE POOPY MEN
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guys suck good job saying good bye that is where i have problems
Past Entries
Goal Updated
Damn. It's never a good idea to go back to a relationship - it proves itself to me everytime. Best of luck re-making your bed! It's not fun, but do what's best for you above all!
WildIndigo
I completely agree with WildIndigo. He had his chanace, and he blew it by making you unhappy. There's a lot of truth in this saying - a good horse never turns back and eat grass behind him. Move on.
BlueBerries
The greatest predictor of future behavior is past behaviors. Sad, but true of others and ourselves. Trust your gut and get out of your HEAD!! You need to take care of yourself physically and mentally and don't have the energy for that and drama. If you weren't happy with him before,... I agree with the comments above. you deserve happiness but you have to CHOOSE it!
ourlittleeden