So..what a day..I hope ya'll don't mind me playing out my days here, griping, ..it just helps to let it go..you know? Get it OUT! I know you understand that. Today went well, work was good, nice to have more people in office to chat with..she texted me earlier just to ask if I was ok. She always asks if I am ok. At least she's thinking of me. Hard to understand how she could just turn it off, like that..but she wrote me that she was trying to get stronger. That she was not avoiding me. She is busy with work, new apt, family, etc. We agree that time will tell and we both need to gain personal strength. Still hard though, as I am in love with her, and that sits in my soul. Any suggestions welcome. I write and smoke like a madwoman..it helps though. Also had sit down dinner with Jess tonight. I usually don't eat much, not hungry, but we sat and ate together and she appreciated that. So that's a good step right? Thanks for listening, as always..
You've got that right, she is thinking of you and she is trying to get stronger. Atleast she knows enough about her issues to focus on fixing them instead of letting them get worse. As much as you want to be with her right now, seeing her get worse or hurt everyday would just destroy you! She is maybe keeping her distance to protect you in a way. I think she does care a great deal for you but just needs this time to heal. The best thing you can do is be there for her when she DOES need you. You're doing everything right. I know that's hard to see but you are.
The things that have really helped me to deal are setting a goal for myself to have something to focus on besides my relationship. Also journaling helped a ton because I didn't have to hold all those feelings inside. Just being around people too and not staying at home all the time will at least temporarily take your mind off things. Hope that helps, wow that was long! :o)
Michelle76