Beckeroo's Hugbook

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Liz11 (7:06 am)

Becky, lot of warm hugs to you for your always valued support and input.
Flower

smilelyface1234 (07/09/08)

Hope your feeling better these days, how are you doing, here are some flowers to brighten your week!!!
Good Luck

swimgirl88 (07/07/08)

Hello, I am new to this site and I have been on Synthroid for 6 years and still have symptoms, so let me know what you think of the book.
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/05/08)

Hi Beckeroo, Thank you for your message again. I like writing with you! :0) I'm so glad you were having a better day than the one before. Any improvement is good!! Well done for sticking it out. It isn't easy, and that's what makes you so brave. I agree that God is a major source of strength too. I feel very cared for by God, even when things are at their very worst (often feel God's presence more then, not less!). It gives me a base of deep peace that I don't know how people live without.!! My favourite thing about God is his ability to give new life. The power of resurrection is ALL around us- in bulbs and rosebushes, and cats with their nine lives, and food I ruin cooking but Greg kindly eats anyway, and in the deepest of depression when suddenly things just start getting better. I LOVE that power of new life. I love how it's here NOW, not just 2000 years ago. My friend Elizabeth who has been battling melanoma for three years, died at last. She wanted to fade away, and she finally did. Her funeral will be on Thursday, so I will try to get to it. I miss her. I was missing her already anyway, because she was so far gone. She was like an Aunt to me. Lived two streets from my mom's house. Was always around. I'm glad she got to meet Kiki, and Kiki met her. Elizabeth welcomed Kiki so warmly and excitedly. I feel sorry for her three grown-up kids, one with an undiagnosed untreated but obvious intellectual disability. Sorry to hear about your dad. So sad to see someone you love not able to think like they used to, or remember things they used to take for granted. I'm Really glad I found you for a friend too Beckeroo!! :0) I love this DS. I've found some very precious people here. VERY good for folks like us who battle with isolation and loneliness. You are a lot of fun, and full of depth and experience too. I wish we could sit down and have a big cuppa (cup of tea or coffee and a chat) together! Every day!! Wouldn't that be good!! :0) Love to you from me, Rach. O!!!! hugs! O!!!
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/04/08)

Oh my precious friend Beckeroo, How lonely and sad and unfulfilled you sound!!!! I ache for your unhapiness. It sounds so painful!!! :0( I can barely imagine how it must be to live with such chemical sensitivities. My mom has a lot of allergies, and always avoids certain things, but I'm not that bad, and we can certainly go into stores, etc. I really hope you find a great solution to your matress problem!! My brother is really against new things with their poisonous gases. Especially chipboard and carpets- they're his pet hates. You poor darling! Could on option be possibly trying to lay on your friends' matresses to see how they feel, then get your hubby to buy one like the most comfy one? Your friends might have already outgassed matresses. You might have problems going into other homes though, if you have such allergies. I can't imagine avoiding stores!!!! I NEED them to find my good ol self!! It really is her favourite place. Even just looking at everything at a huge toy sale at KMart yesterday with Kiki was fun (we treated it like a toy library trying out all the toys there in their packaging), and we bought a $2.99 dimpley ball in the end, so she feels like she got something special at the fun store. I can't spend much money cuz we are madly saving for a property, but I still love GOing to stores and LOOKING. Where do you find your solace, or your inspiration, or your energising? ? I'm so sorry you're having a crappy holiday!!!! How awful!! Doesn't sound very happy in your home. Does your hub have avoidant personality disorder or something? I've got a friend whose ex had that and he sounded similar. Very sad and lonely!! I don't know how you cope. Or maybe you don't!! ! Don't worry about the group, Beckeroo. It can be depressing if you read others' secrets, so leave it for now at least. There are better things for you to be doing with your time and energy. Have you looked through some of the groups? You find them by going to DS's Home page and looking at the groups listings which you find the link to, on the right of your screen. There are hundreds!!!!!!!!! Kiki has a bad cold. I've got her snot all over me. She's looking miserable. We gave her her first ever paracetemol today. It seemed to help a lot. Whew!! We can always take her to the hospital if she goes downward quickly. It's Australia- they're free. She's haing a nap now, and I think I'll try to get a bit of sleep too... oh no, she's awake!! Gotta go! Love from Rach
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/03/08)

A friend of mine had a daughter who died, and now she finds cockatoo crest feathers around from her daughter when she really needs the encouragement. It's a beautiful thing!! I'm glad you've realised they're a gift from your mom. She really loves you Becky!!!! You sound very easily lovable too. Post Secrets and Our Loving DS Family is an interesting group. I think originally there was some movement around the world to send postcards with secrets on them, I don't know if it was just into the mail void, or to a specific address. Now this group runs here as a place for people to put their secrets. I've found it REALLY therapeutic!!!! It's helped me both start looking at new things, and let go of some things. Very useful for me!! I feel less alone and less weird when I read what other people have written too. The odd writing there haunts me for a while, esp those by Dazzler (brilliant writer!), so if you want to avoid other peoples' emotional baggage, you might prefer to use the group to write in rather than read in. I don't know. I'm sure it's not everyone's cup of tea, but I just thought you might find it useful. If not, that's entirely okay! No pressure at all. My baby Kiki is sick with a nasty cough and a dripping nose- her second significant cold. We did well to get this far through winter cold-free. I'm glad you found DS and I found yoU!! You are delightful and real and articulate. I love writing back and forth with you. I hope you're getting through your quiet day with strength. I miss the hubbub of my life in Melbourne. I used to run mosaic classes at my house and out, and run a childrens' art program at a church, and I nannied and had friends over all the time, etc, etc. Now I've got one good friend in this country town of 20,000 people, and she will be moving to Sydney in about two months. Then it will just be Greg and Kiki and I. And our eight cats and our ferret. Very quiet and boring and unconnected!!! I love people so much. Have a wonderful meal out with your friend. lots of love from Rachel hug! O!!
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/02/08)

Your kids and you mom would feel so special to know how much you miss them. They would want you to grieve and move through the sadness too, so you can find new things around you to grab hold of and lean on and love. I ache for your losses. How hard they must be on you!!! I send you my hope that you will find new hapiness and new passion for life. Loss is the worst thing, because you can't get it back!! I've not lost my mom. I can't imagine how agonising that would be. I love her to bits!!! I have moved around ALL my life though, including moving countries seven times, and I know I hate loss and grief. I know it creates a deep open wound which sometimes never heals fully. I know I have to stop and see what is important in my life and highly prioritise that every day, or it will be gone and I will regret missing it when it was there. I know you're hurting hugely, and I am sorry for your pain. Sorry that you are so sad. I wish I could make it all better!!! I'm sending you an extra special big hug with this. Love to you, from Rachel O!!
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/02/08)

Oh Sweetie!!!!! Big hugs to both you and your old self!! Maybe you could read childrens' stories every bedtime and lure your old self back out of the schoolroom. Or if she was the teacher, maybe you could tell her about other kids in your life now who need her back... or tell her about the childrens' stories you have waiting for her to read to kids... I'm so sorry for your loss of her with the schoolroom. It sounds like it was traumatic. If you want to write about it, I'm here. Always here for you!!! Big huggles!!!! Our vacuum cleaner was out of stock when we bought it, so it will probably arrive today. I don't want it sucking up my old self out of our new washing machine!! I've just got a hold of her again! I'm a little concerned about how powerful the vacuum cleaner might be. ;0) It's a Dyson!!! :0)
Hug

Catstiptoes (07/01/08)

I just found my old self! Greg and I boiught a vacuum cleaner and washing machine because ours were crap, and my old self was hiding in them!! It's amazing where these things can turn up. Hope this sheds some more light on where yours might be hiding out. >^~^<
Good Luck

Catstiptoes (06/30/08)

Good luck in finding your old self! It can be a difficult thing, I know. Have you tried looking under your bed? My old self sometimes hangs out at the shops. That's where I find her occasionally. ;0)