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Journal Entry for October 4, 2007 Mood
Thursday, October 4, 2007

so my sister tells me i should vent smore and she is right. i hate it hate it hate it hate it so much. a friend just had a baby and she sent pictures of her at the hospital with ALL of her family the baby's grand parents and great grandparents. why can't we have that too??? it hurts so much

life is so busy, i barely have time to think except at night like this.  i go and go and go and it just does not stop

the dog is sick, shitting blood and diarhea all over the place last night and twice today, i can't take another thing. i want thits year to just END already and be overwith

i wanted to do so much for christmas to help make it bette rand my aunt is just shooting everything down. then stay the fuck home and drink with your husband, it is so hard and i thought we could help each other through it and it is so obvious we can not. everything is a fucking chore for her. then stay the hell home.

i don't want to be sad. i don't want ross to look at the sky every time i say "bradie' to him.  i wanted him to know her, her face, her smile, her laugh. she was supposed to teach him to love, and to do puzzles. we can teach him but it's not the same

6 months is coming SIX months without my mom and it already is too much. how do i go THE REST without her? i don't wanna at all

how will i have another baby without her?  it is all TOO much

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Comments

  1. MichaelD

    I'm listening....


    MichaelD

  2. KelleyS

    Can you take the 16th off? Or, half day?


    KelleyS

  3. KelleyS

    I know, Judi is being awful. I appreciate ALL you are trying to do, I really really do. Please dont let her ruin it. Maybe she should jsut stay home. Mom would kieck her ass. I am going to email that to her. I will send you that same email so you can see. I love you jen, i know, any other kids will be really wonderful yet really hard. it kills me too.


    KelleyS

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