headaches and dizziness are still …
headaches and dizziness are still bad. It's so rainy and crappy today, Didn't even want to get out of bed.
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He's been suffering for years...mis-diagnosed, called hypochondriac, teased...He knew something was wrong. My heart broke for him, knowing he was suffering, but not knowing why, or how to fix it...getting exasperated with him because there was always something...
Now, we know what it is...prolactinoma...big word...tumor on pituitary gland at base of brain...pretty scary to hear the big "T" word, but truly, this is the "Irish Sweepstakes" of tumors, if you're gonna get a tumor, this is the one you want, or that's what doctors tell us, and they are right...that said, it still sucks pretty hardcore...
Imagine being a man, suffering PMS type mood swings, depression, breast tissue growth, lactation, (yup, breast milk from a man, hows that for the self esteem?) headaches, dizziness, rashes, itching, weight gain, fatigue, and the list of symptoms goes on...
Add to that, family and friends who swing from sympathy to exasperation, from acceptance to ridicule, pep talks telling him to cheer up, pluck up, buck up, man up, look at the bright side, etc...
Then throw in financial stress that increases every day of work missed due to debilitating headaches dizziness and disorientation...and still he paints a smile on his face as often as he can, and tries to live his life as normal as he can under the circumstances...does the smile help? Well, it helps everyone around him, but doesn't really help him all that much, because people see him smiling and think to themselves "he doesn't look sick", and so they push him, and pick at him or make demands of him...
Those who love him most are the ones who hurt him most, because they don't want to face this problem, don't want to discuss it, don't want to hear him complain one more time that he is nauseous, or that his head hurts, or that he just doesn't feel good...they don't want to face how serious this is, or how long the road to recovery is, or how every treatment for the tumor has its own set of drawbacks, its own side effects...they love him, but they get tired of this whole mess and just want to shut it out, and shut him out...not their fault, they're only human...I'm only human...
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what a emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially draining thing for both of you to go thru. i pray that with this diagnosis that he will feel much, much better with treatment and maybe atleast he has been validated with those who dismissed him and his symptoms and showed him no support. thankfully you where there for him and picked up the slack from others (which is draining on you to say the least). you both seem to be awesome people and are so blessed to have each other. hang in there and keep up the great work you do for each other and the fantastic attiude you have!
will keep you both in my prayers! God Bless!!
alexxx130