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12:53 am
I know it's been a while since I wrote anything. but I've just been so tired lately. After coming home from work, I've been spending time with my son, cooking him dinner, straightening up the house and then going to bed right after I put my son to bed.
Nothing has really changed with this whole situation. He still talks to her every night and goes and sees her twice a week.
He continous to spend more quality time with our son and is actually putting him first instead of her, ever since I went off on him a few weeks ago, so I guess that is an improvement. He also treats me more like a person instead of crap.
Every day brings the day that he will move out closer, and I'm dreading it. The nights that he is gone, are aweful, I feel lonely, I'm hurting, I don't know what to do with myself after my son goes to bed, I don't sleep very well, etc.
I really think I'm not gonna be able to actually start healing and move on till he moves out and I don't see him everyday. Because right now it feels like every time he texts her on her cell phone, every time he calls her, every time he goes and sees her, it's a slap in my face and it just ripps my heart out all over again. Spending time with him in the evenings and knowing I can't snuggle up to him anymore, knowing he doesn't love me any more, knowing I lost him as my husband is pure hell.
At least I'm getting better at not crying all the time. But there are still plenty of times, when I just sit there (especially in the evenings) and tears silently fall down my face and I can't stop them, but at least I'm not sobbing uncontrollable anymore. But the pain feels just as bad now as it did when he first told me.
We got our son's report card today. A's all across the board. I just hope that daddy moving out will not affect our son's grades next year. He's made so much progress with his ADHD this school year, and I really hope we're not gonna end up starting from scratch next school year.
I'm trying to focus on one day at a time, but it's hard
I know it's been a while since I wrote anything. but I've just been so tired lately. After coming home from work, I've been spending time with my son, cooking him dinner, straightening up the house and then going to bed right after I put my son to bed.
Nothing has really changed with this whole situation. He still talks to her every night and goes and sees her twice a week.
He continous to spend more quality time with our son and is actually putting him first instead of her, ever since I went off on him a few weeks ago, so I guess that is an improvement. He also treats me more like a person instead of crap.
Every day brings the day that he will move out closer, and I'm dreading it. The nights that he is gone, are aweful, I feel lonely, I'm hurting, I don't know what to do with myself after my son goes to bed, I don't sleep very well, etc.
I really think I'm not gonna be able to actually start healing and move on till he moves out and I don't see him everyday. Because right now it feels like every time he texts her on her cell phone, every time he calls her, every time he goes and sees her, it's a slap in my face and it just ripps my heart out all over again. Spending time with him in the evenings and knowing I can't snuggle up to him anymore, knowing he doesn't love me any more, knowing I lost him as my husband is pure hell.
At least I'm getting better at not crying all the time. But there are still plenty of times, when I just sit there (especially in the evenings) and tears silently fall down my face and I can't stop them, but at least I'm not sobbing uncontrollable anymore. But the pain feels just as bad now as it did when he first told me.
We got our son's report card today. A's all across the board. I just hope that daddy moving out will not affect our son's grades next year. He's made so much progress with his ADHD this school year, and I really hope we're not gonna end up starting from scratch next school year.
I'm trying to focus on one day at a time, but it's hard
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I really don't know how you can live like that. I hope that one day your son realises what a fine mother he has. You will stay in my prayers.
jabies