DevonB's Journal

I had my yearly physical about a month ago.  It was then that I learned about Fibromyalgia. 

I had expressed to my partner that I felt achey and tired all the time.  Frankly, I assumed that everyone sort of felt that way.  She told me it wasn't normal.  So, when I went to my Doctor, I mentioned it.  After a few pressure points, she told me about Fibro.  I went home and cried.  I was in such pain from being prodded. 

I had lived on the hope that one day I would wake up feeling refreshed and rested and energetic.  This was a shattering of that hope.  I would never feel that way.  I was crushed.

It took me a few days, but I got over it.  I realized that there was no amount of wailing and moaning that would change things, and decided to push forwards.

However, I guess I wasn't all that positive because I decided, to hell with it...and started smoking again.

I went back for a visit and the doctor told me that my blood test had come back.  Everything was normal, except my bad cholesterol was high, and my good cholesterol was next to nothing.  She mentioned that if I was smoking, it causes the good cholesterol to plummet.  The only thing to get my cholesterol under check was to exercise.

Great...says I.  Just lovely.  How does one exercise when one barely has enough energy to make it through the day?

So, I'm quitting smoking.  I just am not sure, as of yet, how to get the exercise in.  I know, I know...get out and walk.  Get out and move...just do anything.  But it isn't that easy.  I am tired, and in pain.  I ache, and want to sleep.  The thought of doing anything doesn't even arise in my poor little brain.

I am not yet giving up.  I had a week off for vacation, and moved more than I usually do at my desk-bound job, and felt much better than usual.  So I know that I must move...I must.  It's just a question of how to incorporate it into my life.

Cheers.