kylieml78's Journal

Well I went to the docs yesterday and had a check up on me and bubs. Was happy when I got there but sad when I left. Bubs is fine all well and healthy and so am I. Just that the docs wont let me go early. I have big babies therefore would like to go at least a week or 2 early. For the babies benefit and mine. I am already at that stage where I feel like I cant take anymore mentally and physically. This happened with my last one/ After she was born I was fine though.

My blood level is low so they want me to get it back up. Which I understand.  But I have 3 kids at home to take care of to at the moment. I can barely move and not sleeping well. My hips are killing me. My emotions are up and down and yes I do know its part of being pregnant. But still I feel like crap.

I burst into tears when the doc told me.

To top it off my youngest at the moment is turning 5 on tues. So off to school next term. That is affecting me too. My kids seem to be making me yell everyday. It is so frustrating. My partner wasnt home wed night had a trade show to go to. I was home by myself and the kids were absolute shits! They were in bed by 7pm. They werent listening, fighting, and running through the house.

Oh well, thats life. I am happy with everything else. Just frustrated with this prgnancy now and the kids. Why is it when you tell the kids off they dont listen yet the second dad comes home they listen?

I sometimes wonder if I am a good mum and if I am doing the right thing by them. I feel worthless and like I need to scream.

Well the weekend now will see how it goes.