crtoufornow’s Profile

Close Breakups & Divorce

Just recently divorced, inFebruary. We went through about three years of seperation before I finally had to file and try to move on. This was my second marriage, I thougt it was going to be my last. We were together, dating then living together for seven years before getting married. I wanted to make sure I didn't make the same mistake I did when I was younger. I never really loved my first husband, when I left him, I never looked back, never second guessed that. I have three children from first one, I got pregnant at seventeen and due to pressure, mostly from his side of family we got married. He knew I didn't love him like I should have, yet he was the one that cheated and was never at home for most of the marriage. To this day he says he still loves me. He was very controlling. If I wasnt doing something with his family, then I wasnt really allowed a social life. My main goal in first marriage was to stay married and have a family for my three children. We stayed together for thirteen years(that seems to be my magic number) When I met my second husband I was very happy being single, he's ten years younger and not my type at all but he won me over. I tried to keep him as a friend but he was the one that wanted more. When I finally fell, and fell so hard, then he started leaving. In retrospect, our realationship never should have gone past the first time he left. He would get scared and leave, wait (it seems) til I was over him then come back. He did come back, we were together for five years, I thought it was safe, so I wanted to be married, he said, he felt that in his heart already but if I needed it legal then so did he. Seems right after we married that things went down hill fast. I became so insecure, he has a very out going personality, suddenly I become a fragile mess, then find out he's doing meth..the next six years went down hill pretty quickly, now I am again divorced.

Treatments

Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked

family support very helpful even when I was going back trying to work things they were there to help me pick up pieces when it didnt

Writing Working / Worked

writing does help me. Keeping a journal has always been good for me.In good times and bad.