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karlajd’s Profile
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karlajd
is feeling OK
You played me.............
Recently: 18 hugs given, 12 discussion replies more …
About Me
I really enjoy my job because i care for other people and it's so busy i forget how i feel sometimes. Plastered smile and nobody knows inside how low i feel somedays. I love my cat Jammies :) His purrs are the best :) LOL. i feel like i lost something... a part of me a long time ago so i don't really feel whole. i want to feel loved and stop feeling like my world is forever broken. Some day i will find the strength to rebuild the ruins :) i hope.... i'm a sociable person at times with alot to give but i've been hurt so often i don't trust easily. i can also get quite introverted and block out loved ones but they know not to take offense that i just need to retreat. i want to be better... i want the emptiness to be filled. i was raped and abused verbally for 2 years til i ran away ......... i need home but can't go back there for him.... he is there and i can't go back there. i am with a gut who obviously couldn't care less... i can go into detail with trusted friends but why i am with him is because he is better than most.............. i do love him but 9 years wthout/// i am tired and don't know what to do
Interests
My work, my cat, my family. Spending time with my closest friends. Listening to music - anything from Heavy Metal to Classical :) Watching CSI, Dexter, Heroes, BSG and Reaper :) Anything to fill sleepless nights :) i adore reading and writing poetry and reading crime/thriller books. Listening to Pantera, Nine Inch Nails, Iron Maiden, Metallica, Tori Amos, favourite piano piece is Moonlight Sonata, Black Sabbath, AC/DC, Smashing Pumpkins, Type O negative, Prophecy, Emporium, Cradle of Filth, Ozzy, ....... Very lost person
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Journal
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Hugbook
Hug
Hi Ms Karla, Thank you for the HUG you can kick my ass at Texas hold-em anytime I am sure you are a card shark. I like to hear when you having a good time. My son and I are having blast it is great to spend time with him he has three more weeks left :o)> I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime. I will be happy. This assumes to be true, “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be” Quote Abraham Lincoln. I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will my “luck” as it comes and fit myself to it. I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will study I will learn something useful. I will not be a metal loafer. I will something about treatments-recovery that requires effort, thought and concentration. Then apply and try the things I have learned. I will exercise my mind and soul in three ways; I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out: if anybody knows of it; it will not count. I will do at least two things I do not want to do-just for exercise . I will not show anyone that my feeling are hurt; they may be hurt but today I will not show it. I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I will not find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself. I will have a plan. I may not follow exactly but I will have one. I will save myself from two demons; hurry and indecision. I will have a quite half hour all by myself and relax or meditate; During this half hour , sometime, I will try and get a better perspective of my life and where I want it to change-improve. I will be unafraid. Especially I will not to be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me. Regards, Martin XXX
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Hug
Hi Karla, I love Texas Hold-Em I played in a tournament here at the casino in San Diego won ist prize $365 it is an awesome game the buy in was only $15. I am happy you are enjoying your guest. My son just arrived from Scotland this week he is 26 my hero. He is her for a month I am loving that. Hoping all is well with you take care. Regards Martin
I’m With You
about the message- i think we all have that fear. some one we know, will find thsi site and us on it- and that some one being a person we dont want to find it... at least i have that same exact fear. i have contemplated leaving many times, for that reeason alone, ...infact its the same reason why i dont talk about alot of things that i want to. thats why i decided to make mine privaite..not that it ables me to talk freely, i still dont, but i feel a bit more safe..if that makes any sense. and please dont leave :) we readheads need eachother! :)
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Gold Star
83 days smoke free! :) redheads can do anything!
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Hug
havent been on in a long while, hope all is well with you. HUGGGGSSSS! =]
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Photos
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Goals
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Support Groups
Close Depression
: Clinical (Major) DepressionI've been treated for depression for 10 years now. History of bulemia and M.E.also. Normally i'm ok but some days i feel a bit lost.
Treatments
- Celexa Somewhat Helpful
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Somewhat Helpful
- Very tiring but good treatment. After years of medication i was sick of tablets and getting no answers... still feeling low and found that i just retreated into myself. CBT is teaching me that somethings are not my fault.
- Cymbalta Not Working
- Was on Duloxetine and it made me worse than i ever was.
- Effexor Working / Worked
- Was great then after 7 years developed an intolerance
- Lexapro Somewhat Helpful
- Didn't really help at all
- Paxil Not Working
- Terrible side effects from Paroxetine
- Prozac Not Working
- It was as useless as a sweet
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- Writing Somewhat Helpful
- When i keep up with it.. very busy job
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Snapshot
Recently …
- 18 hugs given
- 11 hugs received
- 2 journal posts
- 1 discussion post
- 12 discussion replies
- 2 journal comments
- 4 photo comments
