June 9, 2008 8:01pm
Ok, so I am starting my journal. I have had a bad day and I can't sleep. I love so much about my life... my husband, family, friends and great …
I was involved in two car accidents in the space of one month. Dec 19th 2005 and Jan 19th 2006. Trying to cope but it has left me with considerable anxiety and fear of crashing again.
Trying to put myself first. Have never been very good at putting myself first, and as a result of that I invest a lot of my time helping, listening and being there for others. In return I have often felt unvalidated, used and worn out. Bad circle and I want to be around people who are givers...not takers. That doesn't mean that I can't be a good listener if anyone feels like talking here :-)) I want to be better at standing up for myself, and for people to stop taking me for granted !!
I think that I am depressed due to all the stress in my life during recent years. Two car accidents and both parents being diagnosed with cancer(both are doing well now)over the course of 7 years, has taken it's toll on me. Now that things have calmed down, I just feel very sad and down. I used to like a glass of whitewine but alcohol makes me depressed now. One glass is all it takes. I just can't seem to be the old me anymore, and I get very down. I miss the old me !!
