aubreygrey's Journal

feast or famine, journal-wise I guess. obviously it is feast today, though I wish it were more the sumptuous kind. Actually, I am on now for the express purpose of asking for prayer for tomorrow. I am going to see a specialist for my diabetes. I haven't been to a doctor since the last check up after my liver surgery last year. That doctor has a way of making you feell really relaxed in his presence, but then you leave with all kinds of questions that come to you after you are driving away. I'm trying not to panic, have the rumblings of a headache, of flashbacks, and just that "want to duck for cover and hide in a fetal position" feeling. I HATE doctors, I have to bring my youngest with me because I have no choice and I feel like he'll just tell me I'm screwing it all up. Well, of course I am. I'm terrified of doctors and have both him and a gyn this week. I need to get other recommendations from him. I don't know. I can't find the words. I'm frustrated and useless and have to function whether I want to. Just pray for me, send good thoughts, whatever. Please. Will post afterwards. It'll probably be far better than I am fearing.