samiam113's Journal

I'm feeling pretty anxious and down (my beta is tomorrow and I am thinking I'm probably not pregnant). I'm trying to do something to make me feel better, so I thought I'd update on my goal and reflect about what I have done.

I am proud of myself for:

-keeping to dr. orders (no/ reduce caffiene, lots of water, no ib.)

-doing the shots (this was my first time and I was very scared about the needles)

-keeping a good attitude (up until now haha)

-doing everything I could to make this IUI successful

-breathing and having good thoughts during the IUI

-not getting overly emotional (up until now)

OK So, I just finished crying my eyes out (I think I needed it). Thank god for my wonderful, sweet, non-judgmental dog, Sandy. She always knows when I am upset and came over and gave me her paw. 

So at this point, its out of my hands. I've done all I can and I am proud of myself for that. I cannot be hard on myself for something that I know in my heart I have done the very best I can do to make this goal come true. I just keep thinking on how it just sucks that you can do your very best and still get nothing (not even a runner-up award for following dr.s orders haha).

so I guess we will see.