anglondn818’s Profile

Close Meth Addiction & Recovery

Im a 42 year old male and I serve an Awesome God. Im now 3and1/2 years sober from a 20 year drug/meth addiciton. Im hoping my testimoney will help others that might read it. You can always call on the Lord and I want people to know this. The last 20 years I was addicted to an assortment of drugs. But my biggest addiction was Crystalmeth and that took over all the other drugs. My life was a mess from within, you couldn't tell by lookin at me, I was a miserable mental case sad and suicidal. My brother passed away in 2002 at the age of 39 and that ruined me. I started to use more meth after he died and my heart was always in physical pain, every time I got high my chest would start having these sever pains and I would use more meth in hoping my life would end along with my misery and my addiction and my pain and loss of my brother. There would be times I would be on my knees begging the Lord to take me away, almost threatening my life to Him. Telling Him if its Hell I will go to then let me go. Im tired of this life God PLEASE! The last time I used meth was the night Jesus came and spoke to me, I believe I was dieing my body and heart was finally giving up. Overdose is a terrible feeling, I felt the devil pulling on me my mind was in turmoil I was hearing grounded out radio voices in my head, my heart felt as if there was knives going through it and I can hear the devil saying to me in my ear "now you are mine". Everything was all so crazy, it was like a nightmare while being awake. Im thinking Im doomed for good now, no way out of this one. Then I hear clear as ever, "Is this what you want?""this is not what you want." "Call my name and I will help you" " Call my name and I will save you." Jesus? Is that you? Jesus! I love you! Im dieing Jesus, and the devil is pulling on me, he's got his claws deep in my heart, and my mind is going crazy. Jesus Please! Please help me! Save me! I love you! The chest pains was gone all of the sudden, the misery left too, radio voices where gone, the devil was gone and I felt at sudden peace. And then it was just me and Jesus. Jesus said speak to me. Jesus Im so messed up, drugs make me want to die, my brother died and I miss him and want to be with him. Your brother is with me now. Jesus im drug addicted and I cant stop on my own, I need you back in my life Jesus! Please help me! Jesus said to me in His soft voice, go to sleep and when you wake you will be new again. I went to sleep and when I woke up the next morning I was no longer addicted to drugs, I actually felt real good, and I never felt good when I woke up,I always woke up needing drugs. But NOT this time. This time I woke up I felt like I never did drugs in my life. Ive been blessed by the Lord! Jesus saved me!