HarleyHowie's Journal

First of all since I know anyone reading this might think to ask . .  .

NO  I don't smoke . .  never have.

23 different doctors have looked at me as if I'm lying when I say I don't smoke.

So if you do . . . I pray you find a way to quit.

I also have mild issues with the tobacco companies since my mom died smoke and died from  Emphysema.  I could go n forever!

So once upon a time I caught a cold.  I don't get them often, so when I do they usually make up for lost time and last a couple of weeks. 

I also have a little sinus problem that causes any infection I get to last quite a while due to slow drainage.  So the lymph node on the left side always gets big and stays big until the sinus finally clears up.

This whole process started about a year and a half ago and I ended up with a lump under my neck that I thought was my lymph node just doing it's job because I had caught my first cold in about 5 years.  Hey!  I'm a helathy guy!

So there I am with a lump about the size of your thumb for weeks and not thinking anything about it.

and more weeks .  . . and then it gets a little bigger than ever before and I start wishing I had med insurance   but I don't and it's probably fine.

Then I change jobs and get insurance and it's about a 3 inch lump that I want to get checked out because I'm thinking by now the lymph node had died since it never got this big before..... no thought of cancer because this thing has been here almost a year now and I'm fine . . . just a bump under my neck.

So I get it checked

So it's a tumor  and it's Tonsil cancer . . . . (and if you look even this website doesn't have a listing . .  who the heck gets tonsil cancer?)

nope  Never had em out as a kid  Hey!  I'm a healthy guy!

So I get a tonsilectomy  Ow!

Then I get a neck disection   Ow plus and a half!

Then . . . . for reasons unbeknownest to anyone anywhere . . . . I'm getting radiation and chemo

Why rad/chemo?  well lets see.... we got the tonsil and did a biopsy.... found absolutly nothing anywhere . . . .

Then we took the tumor from the outside and 33 lymph nodes and assorted muscle and other stuff . . .  biopsy biopsybiopsybiopsy   absolutely nothing of any kind whatsoever. . . .

All done right?

Nope!  you need radiation and chemo

Why? did you find anything?

No but . . . .

Oh okay so after rad/chemo you'll be able to tell me it's all gone right?

Uh . . . no....

why not?

Well because there isn't a test we can do to tell you that

So what tells you I need chemo and rad right now?

Uh . .  . . nothing?

So six weeks of radiation and deadly chemicals just in case?

yes!

But then you won't be able to tell me anything

Right!  but we can look for mass!!

you could do that now!

But the radiation will increase your chance of survival!!

Based on what eveidence?

Uh . . . . well statistics show better survival

statistics . . .  based on no test since there isn't a test

Well yeah!

So this is just because

yep!  But hey  you're a healthy guy!

Not anymore.

By the way . .  I call this my holiday cancer

Got diagnosed almost on newyears 2008 , , ,

Had a tonsilectomy

Had my neck disection on Feb 14th cuase it's so romantic after all

Started my Radiation (for the giggles it gives me) a few days after my Birthday

And it will end just a week before Memorial day!

Happy Holidays!

Who gets the irony?  ::tap tap::  is this thing on??

I call it the tanning booth

lets face it . .  linear  accelerator sounds like someone's trying to boost me out of an airlock on the USS Enterprise . . .

I never took Captain Kirks girl!

Why me??