Touchnheaven's Journal

The reality of my own situation is

I am letting a bad situation

Take the better of me 

Trying to make me feel better, about me

It is very difficult for me to achieve

Whatever it is, this personal goal of mine

Sidetracked with guilt gets back in my mind 

Trying real hard, it is hard to see it, but I really am

Daydreamer girl, alone here she stands

Could go either way, reality, or some other place in her head

It is only 8:45 am and I already think, I should go back to bed 

Swaying on reality’s it is just the way that I am

Cuz I would rather be happy somewhere in the sand

Oh, I sigh to myself as I look to the mess I just made

I think my life is all made up and I will be the cause of all destruction 

                                   Is it all a fiscade? 

A fiscade of delusion, a fiscade of delight

A delight so disa~delusioned I am fighting for life

I hang my head here as I choke back yet another set of tears

Growing within me, kept them locked inside years 

There’s more to this thought but I don’t want to share yet I am not ready to share and maybe I never will but we will see.  Day to day I can understand but this level of dread is heavy to hold.