NewLife25's Journal

So I went to a job interview this morning - as long as they don't do more than a credit check as background screening (I was arrested in April) I should be okay.  Then I gave a bid on a cleaning job.  All this driving is killing my gas tank though and a woman I was supposed to clean for this afternoon cancelled on me, so that's less money.  Tomorrow I see my therapist (she drives here thankfully) and Friday I go to the women's center to do an orientation/job thing and beg for diapers and rent money and a gas card.  Ah, the joy of government help.  Unfortunately, with unemployment and homelessness at all time highs around here, there is a 2-year waiting list for section 8 housing.  Did I mention I'm broke?  lol, it's hard not to let that be the focus of my day, but I did okay.

Ate too much.  My friend bought groceries and the day & day after a shopping trip Mia likes to come out to play.  When I lived with my mom, every time she'd go on a week long conference or business trip I'd empty the fridge the first two days (Mia) and then starve till she got home (Ana).  Trying not to fall into that again.  At least I'm not purging, right?  Possibly that's because I have to share one bathroom with like five other people in a two-bedroom plus attic house... I so want enough money to pay for a place for *just* me and my son.  We've been in someone else's house all along and it's just hard because I have to ask a 2-year-old to make constant accommodations, and the house isn't baby-proofed so that's always an issue - following him around, keeping him shut up in the room watching tv all the time, etc.  Once we have our own place, I'll just keep anything dangerous/expensive/not okay for him to play with locked up or out of reach.  Simple, the sort of thing most parents of toddlers take for granted I guess.  We're not living in the car anymore, so that's a huge plus.

April sucked but May looks a *little* better.  We went to the community pool and that was good.  Tonight I may go out with a friend for a little bit after the baby is asleep to unwind.  I miss marijuana a lot.  Just because it didn't require a sitter and a designated driver and all the other things alcohol does and it was just a nice, at-home buzz.  Since the ex-husband was alcoholic, I don't keep any alcohol in the house and all my roommates are, um, concerned about people using their things so alcohol, toilet paper, etc. is in everyone's room.  Most of them are BOYS so the toile paper isn't such a constant concern for them that it is for me.  I pretty much want a roll in there at all times and I'm not yet totally in the habit of going to the room (especially if baby is asleep) to go get a roll before I pee.  Just never really came up in the 25 years of my life prior to now.  If I wanted to use the bathroom, odds were pretty good all the needed supplies would be close at hand.  Now I have to plan ahead lol.

It could be worse.  I could be *out* of toilet paper again.