is feeling OK
My name is Erica. I have always had a somewhat eating disorder I guess, well sine I was about 13, I have lost and gained 8-15 pounds back and forth for about 6 years. Up until I was 19 I have had my times where everything was wrong in the world, especially my body and what I just ate, so I would eat a bunch of left over veggie pizza and binge on random junk in the pantry, like oreos, and then 10 mns later I would purge. I did this often from age 14-17, then for a few weeks when I was 18, and now I have not purged for over a year at all. I took a psychology class that made me realize why I take my depression and anger out with food. I find when I'm bored I go out and have to eat something sweet and buy a new outfit, I know this isn't healthy. I have gained the most weight so far right now, and well it has showed the most then ever, my back to normal/eat whatever I want weight has always been like 120, now I have lost my firm lovely shape I took for granted. My mom is pretty small, we wear the same size clothes as of now, she is 50 so that should be normal for our family, I know I'm like 20 pounds bigger then her when she was my age, but yes I am not her, but I hate wondering how I will be at age 50 then. I am returning to cosmetology school fairly soon. I am 20 years old and live with my boyfriend and our little black kitty. I played soccer for many years, I was a dancer off and on for 12 years. I used to hike and go on walks often, I live in town which makes me in walking distance to most places I go, which if only I had the motivation to get walk instead of drive to the grocery store 6 blocks away.
i love my boyfriend, he is my best friend and is always supportive. reading, writing, drawing, long walks in the city (when it's warm enough for my liking), hiking, camping, certain video games, soccer, cosmetology, decorating, finding new recipes, coffee, thai food, animals, family, and of course my significant other.
May 17, 2008 1:21am
i feel gross and i almost feel like giving up, but i wont. i haven;t eaten my best, but i have a lot better then usual. i have started to go on one …
May 5, 2008 9:47pm
somehow im only 120 pounds...
i went to the doctors, got weighed twice and yeah... weiiird. i had a blueberry bagel and nonfat cream cheese a …
May 2, 2008 8:09pm
so i ate my first meal of the day at 4:45pm, I didn;t have time to get food at work all day. I drank an orange powerade for breakfast, cause I touch …
May 2, 2008 2:23am
LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT I WANT TO SEE!! im not good at photo shop, but im going to try and …
You are a beautiful young woman, I am sorry you suffer from compulsive eating. I too am a compulsive overeater but i just eat and cant stop sometimes. I lost 129 lbs 2 yrs ago and have gained almost all of it back because i gave up thinking i was a failure. Keep up the good work.
I'm fom nz and yes its unfortunately winter here lol! how was ur day today?
its heading into winter here! ive had a good day just exercise and cleaning and some college work now! r u exaggerating wen u say 100 degrees lol?
how r u doing today?
Hi Pray all is well. Have a great day
Progress
40 %
Progress
10 %
I'm an emotional eater. With depression, anxiety and neglection by my father who showered me in gifts and reeses peanut butter cups when I would see him after months/years. I was bribed and treated with oreos, reeses and cheetos from both my parents, and find myself craving those foods whenever I am depressed, upset, lonely or bored. I've gained and lost 15 pounds for 6 years, I had bulimia off and on for 5 years. I have not purged for over a year, now I need support for my emotional eating.
i have suffered bulimia for 6 years, and have not purged for over a year, but I know that I have my weak times and sometimes just want to give up on trying to be thin by eating good and exercise , I look for short cuts. I have had near anorexia, I have gone 4 months with eating nothing all day except for diet lemonade and sometimes smoothies. Now I eat more then I should, and feel on the edge of going to my old ways...I have gained 10 pounds!
I lost my best friend of over 10yrs May 2007, it has almost been a year , but I still cry often and dwell on the past. I have the what ifs running in my head. I have dreams and nightmares about him often. I have anger toward the people who let him drive drunk and off the cliff and burn in a firing car. I have anger and depression about it and I need him to be here. I lost my uncle who I spent ever summer with September 2007, bad dreams.
I had a miscarriage when I was 16, and when I was 17 was pregnant again, I waited until it was nearly too late, my bf at the time asked it to be his birthday present once we decided to not keep it, his family wanted me to keep it. I told only my best friend, she went with me for the procedure. I was over three months pregnant and started to have a teeny bump. I became depressed and started back to not eating after sleeping 3 days straight. I think back on it often and wonder how it would be
my bf of 4 years was crazy, he controlled who i hung out with, cheated on me 4 times i know of, would break me down inside constantly, was a compulsive liar and forced me into my abortion...i know it was me who did it, but i was an emotional wreck. he stalked me when we broke up for good, have a 5 yr restraining order. still found ways to threaten me and my new bf (the one)
I want to feel good in a bikini! and I want to join the competition!! i want to win for me finnally
