ttaarraa's Journal

I am just so happy right now. I dont know if im in a mania or what lol but im feeling great. im cleaning my house, i have patience for my kids all of a sudden and i just have this urge to call everyone i know and talk talk talk . Its like my life is just starting. I got away from ben, i have a plan for the future with a great social worker to help me out (sounds crazy that im happy to have had them called into my life) and i just feel relieved. This feeling is so different from the past 2 years of my life. I just feel now is my time to shine. Before i got discouraged because its expensive and hard to find daycare or a sitter to work, its hard to get around without a car and the bus is expensive when im broke all the time. Ben had a problem with me going ANYWHERE on my own. BUT NOW I have a bus pass, i have daycare in the process and its going to be paid for. I dont have to deal with ben trying to control where i work or where I go anymore. Its amazing what freedom does for a person lol. I am now in the state of mind where i can finally start helping others on here. I feel like I received  ALOT of help from everyone and its time for me to give back. I really felt selfish because when i would come on here I would be such a mess that I couldnt offer my support back to anyone. Im ready now and im excited to start fresh!!!!!!! HORRAY me lol im such a dork !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! here I come world, you better be ready for me cause im coming with a force and im not giving up anymore.