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This journal entry is viewable only by mamaduches's friends.
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This journal entry is viewable only by mamaduches's friends.
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Its just another day for me,,, Don't feel like doing anything.... I wish that I could be the old Jan that I use to know.... that Happy person I was once.... where did she go?????????? IS this what bipolar does to people??????????? I feel sorry for my own kids and grandkids if this is what the have to look forward too...
So again what do I do about the other night? I have a feeling it is just going to be that one nite thing... I tried to call him for 2 days now and he never answered his phone... He was real sick, hadn't gone to work for 2 days, so I don't know what to do if I should call him now to talk to him or just leave it alone and see what happens from there..... I have a feeling he doesn't want anyone to get hurt, and I don't either... But there is just something about him that I want.... Is it the excitment that someone else wants me besides my hubby..... I really don't know anymore....
I think I will just cralw under a rock and never come out...Or take some pills and never wake up... what ever works... I can feel me going back into a depression all because of this.... I should have controled myself and did nothing but go to bed that night.... I sit here and all I can do is think about that night the teptation is getting greater and greater..... what do I do..... I don't want to pressure him into anything that he doesn't want........
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it does sound like this is a possible trigger... perhaps if you can back off for a bit and see what happens... he may be having equally hard time with what happened and by excusing his self from the situation he is dealing with it... is only my opinion...but i remember making decision while i was drinking and they never turned out to be good decisions or something i would decide while sober...i still am concerned about the mixture of your new med and the drink...i think it had something to do with your decision... i may be wrong... but it is just a hunch... love ya... :)
ducktape
I agree 100% with ducktape!
LissaC