goneinsane's Journal

I'll warn you now, this could be a looooonnnggg journal update if I get 5 minutes to sit and write for a bit!

Okay, I'm at 71 days and I feel pretty damn good. I may keep scaring my, get this, NEW BOYFRIEND =D senseless when I get an urge but I think me and him are getting there together.

Darryl is awesome I have to say. Just the little convosations we get bring me back to life again and here I am happy again. I feel that we're not only boyfriend/girlfriend but almost really good friends coz I can pretty much talk to him about anything and same with him to me.

But off the soppy stuffs coz you're probably sick of it already xD

 I'm feeling alot more positive lately, I'm adding little treats into my day like take a few minutes to look in the mirror and just say "looking pretty damn good today Carly!" and I'll be in hysterics... but its working! Coz I feel good, so I walk out the door feeling better and more confident. People at work are taking notice, theres a guy there that keeps staring at me and smiling and we talk and stuff so its fun I guess =]

I just cant believe I'm getting there and I'm learning etc. I'm learning how to better myself coz I know I deserve better than to be depressed all the time. So fuck to what my doctor said with going on meds, I've got a better way and thats all about using my mind and going against any stupid bad habits I have. I'm gonna still see my counsellor at college though, and on the 16th I start with a psychologist or something at my doctors surgery coz he wanted me to see one and I thought what the hey, lets see if I truly am the mental nutcase my uncles always called me! xD

Nah Im doing pretty good I have to say.

So 29 days to go till 100 days, another 14 on top of that to beat my goal of 114 days, and then who knows =] but I'll get there.

And to anyone that actually bothers to read my journal updates etc, LOOKING PRETTY DAMN GOOD TODAY M'DEAR =]

Carly xxx