atstruckeret's Journal

one day at a time Mood

Monday, April 7, 2008 | A General Update story

Since June of 2003, i have been taking my life one day at a time. I almost lost my life due to encephalitis. If it wasn't for my husband deciding to pass by the house for the night (he's a truck driver and gone for weeks at a time.) I wouldn't be here today.

I've lost my long term memory of family and freinds. It was hard to find out that you are a wife and a mother of 3 children. I've had to reconnect with them all, the funny thing is the feelings that are there. You don't remember giving birth but the feelings are there. I don't know how to actually explain it. You just know.

So for the last 5 years nothing has come back to me from the past. I live day by day and enjoy what i have now.

Sometimes my husband wants the old me back and it's hard to tell him that person is not here anymore. He just doesn't understand.. and sometimes i don't either. But i just take it one day at a time. It's the only thing that i know i can do.

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Comments

I know what an uphill battle this can be but you are not alone...remember that. We quietly try to overcome this battle....welcome to DS and welcome to Encephalitis community. This is a small community within DS but there ARE some of us out there. We know the difficulties you have too.

RuthMH
I know what u r going thru. I lost my memory too and life was hell for years for me. My husband also wanted the "old Deana" back but she just wasn't there - when u go thru E u go thru a peronality change as well as a memory loss. I also devloped seizure problems. My husband ended up divorcing me and he raised the children - i was in no shape so i understand that but my heart was ripped out of my chest. if u want to talk more just write me.

LadyEve