deeds1's Journal

Journal Entry for May 17, 2008 Mood

Saturday, May 17, 2008 | A Sad story

Well, He came and took most of his stuff yesterday, I keep thinking he'll come over and say....let's work things out....but he doesn't - she has turned him into someone I hardly recognize. I hate her for that - we had such dreams for our future, and she has brainwashed him into thinking he's better off without me, and to stay with her - which there is absolutely no future there for them - she not leaving her husband!! - I walk around the house and cry - all our memories are being divided up and taken away. my world has definately come crashing down, and how do you find the strength to pick up the pieces and be happy again? I look at him and he looks right thru me like he's on some kind of hypnotic state - He says it's hard on him too - but HE"S the one that wanted this to happen, HE"S the one to choose her over me - so why is he all sad ? he should be doing a happy dance - he's getting what he wants - some married whore who dates other men on top of it - and is using him - he fails to see the dating other men part - but it's a fact - I don't know what he thinks his life is going to be from what it was - he gave up his house, family, friends, dog, everything - to live in a crappy rental house waiting for her to visit him when she's not with her other boyfriends, or her family. He'll have nothing in life, I was the one to get us a house, and a future - he just went for the ride. Our anniversary is coming up on thursday (22nd) and I have no clue how I'm going to make it thru that day...I want to just hide away and cry all day..