dvmdoc's Journal

Journal Entry for April 4, 2007 Mood

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

WOW...u r going to love this one. IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER!!!
Ok, so those of you now in the legal phase understand what I mean when one says "Moving at the speed of lawyers". We're not their only case, they have religious holidays, bank holidays, fart-stuck-sideways holidays, in court today, etc. It's in jest but you wouldn't want a lawyer being a transplant surgeon or you'd be ashes before (s)he got your heart sewn in. I understand this having worked with many lawyers over the years for a variety of issues and I have great working relationships with all of them and respect them (don't get me wrong) but moving things quickly is not a typical lawyer character trait...
So, as setup, I've been out of the house a YEAR the end of this month. My parents (who live in Canada) have always been involved with the kiddos and have a great relationship with my stbx and the kids. They came down after each birth and helped out for at least 2 weeks each time. NONE of her family, who live in the next state, came to stay for more than 3d any time. My folks are obviously upset at our split and want to maintain contact with the kiddos so they'd call the house in an effort to check in on my stbx and talk to the kiddos who love them to death (and needless to say vice-versa). Point is, my stbx never answers their calls! (caller ID) so they end up leaving messages "Hey ____, hope you're well, we haven't talked to the kids in a while so give us a call sometime...". Has she ever called them back? No! So my mom has stopped trying.
WELLLLLLLLLL, guess who called them tonight in an effort to get them to talk some 'sense' into me because of all she thinks she is entitled to???!! YOU BETCHA BITCHES!! My mom wouldn't pick up but my dad let her say her stuff on the phone (it was after the kiddos were in bed so they still didn't get to talk to them...) to placate her than called me.
Un-freakin'-believable. My mom (so damn life-smart God bless her but can't stop a VCR from blinking 12....) says "Don't worry about it..I have her number! She only calls us when she wants something from you or for us to talk to you! Gimme a break! She's nuts!" Go MOM! LOL. I know moms will ALWAYS be their childrens' biggest defenders so I have to laugh as I'm cuttin' my stbx some slack and my mom is like "SHE'S CRAZY!!"
LOL....
I'm not reacting or reactive - going to stay the bigger person, take the high road, be professional about the whole thing. She's entitled to what she is entitled to not more not less. Fair and equitable. She somehow thinks I should have to PAY for my life choices but that is simply not true in the eyes of the courts. I understand it is how she FEELS but that is not the reality of the situation. She's been living high on the hog for the last year and the reality check is panicking her. Oh, and she hates the fact that I "waste" money on therapy each month and when I suggest she might go she says "I don't need to talk to someone."....

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Comments

WOW! This is just the beginning. I hope all gets better. I am glad you are taking the high road. Does she have any friends to talk to? It sounds like she needs to find someone to chat with. Being on the receiving end I know it is hard but she does have to get moving forward in her own life. ((HUGS))

kinoka
Wow--your STBX has no idea how cool it has been of you folks to stay in touch. My girls have not heard a word from my H's parents since Christmas. Before that it was Easter...so twice a year and they live an hour away.

Sofia324
Take the high road - it's a lot more fun, so I've noticed. You get to sit back and laugh a little at the slaps of reality. Hey - you've got to have fun somewhere right?

Violets0408
Take the high road - it's a lot more fun, so I've noticed. You get to sit back and laugh a little at the slaps of reality. Hey - you've got to have fun somewhere right?

Violets0408
UNBELIEVABLE!! SHE'S A PIECE OF WORK.

Lynn45
Just be patient; this, too, shall pass. She will get her just desserts. My BF actually thought my mother would take his side a time or two, too. Boy, some people have a lot to learn!

LynneC
I'm with you about "taking the high road". In the end, when all is said and done and you have conducted yourself in a civilized manner and she has behaved like a spoiled brat having a tantrum, you will feel good about it. She should be ashamed of herself behaving like this when there are children involved. Not a very good role model, that's for sure.

browneyegurl9363
She is a freakin dumbass

ITALIA73
Wow lots of critics of the STBXW up there. Just remember people do weird things when they are splitting up and when they're grieving(i've experience much weirdness in both situations). They don't act like themselves at all. So protect your own "ass"ets and remind her that she should be thinking about what's best financially and emotionally for your children. NOT HERSELF. This is not all about her, other very important little people are involved.

aloneagain
I'm loving your mom! My mom's the greatest too. What would we do without them.

I don't know about you, but considering the kids, I feel that my therapy is the best money I've ever spent for their sake! (At least one of their parents is doing right by them.) It really wouldn't hurt her at all to talk to a professional. I'd take my therapy any day over cosmetic dentistry! Either way I end up with a great smile ;)

Take care!

sweetpickle
You crack me up!

eph320