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Another good teaching this morning, this time on marriage, I let a few tears slip because this whole subject really upsets me, it brings back memories some of them nice, most of them not so nice. I heard Rob teach on what a marriage should be, and that got to me. I heard him speak on the singleness of people, how they are single before they came together, ie: they had their own ideas, knew where they were going, put God first.. then he contrasted that with modern day marriage, how one blames the other, how the husband isnt so responsive to his wife's needs.. how he just doesnt seem to care about her. (nearly breaking out in sobs here)
I heard him talk about the gift of singleness, you know, never having been married,having all the time in the world to devote to God, His plans, His word and I felt awfully alone, I am not single, I have been married, I am not unsullied, I have had children, and the state of being divorced is not a gift from God, but I have to live with it.. I live with the result of the sin of my husband, and my own sin day after day. It was a good teaching, and delivered with love and respect. I just dont know where someone like me fits in.
Sorry to have rambled on a bit. Sometimes good teaching is extremely hard to take. I dont feel like an outcast, or that I have been rebuked, I just feel very sad, there must be millions of people just like me, man or woman, who feel exactly the same.. I want to ask... What about us! we neither are married nor are we single.. those sodding forms we get through the post make that disctinction..any way thats a different rabbit hole.. which one day I will rant about but not now.
Comments
I'm glad you got to church today.
I get what you mean about the sadness and yes there has to be more of 'us' out there somewhere. I have to admit that it would be nice to have someone to share this life's journey with, but I don't want to be hurt again. The hurt far out weights the sadness for me, so single I will remain.
I hope that you feel the company of God's Holy Spirit today filling you with peace and contentment.
Take care,
hugs Cathy
ragingfog
I wish I had some words of wisdom for you today. I am sure it must be difficult. My dear friend next door has been widowed twice and divorced once(sort of rushed into second marriage after first husband died, and then found out new husband was a serial cheater.) Her third husband was a wonderful man and they had 13 years longer than the doctors had given them. I know she struggles with these issues as well. One thing I have said that seemed to help a little, was no matter what else our postition in life, we are all the children of God. He has adopted us and in him we have become whole. Have a wonderful week. I love you.
hobbes
Hi Vonny. Sounds like a very appropriate teaching for the world in which we live. The divorce rate is almost 50% because we just don't "know how" to be married. People are selfish. It's human nature! We make hideous mistakes and hurt our spouses, and people feel left behind. I've seen it in almost every couple I've know in the last ten years. Five have gotten divorced. My best friend just finalized hers and now she is alone with 2 boys, husband was an alcoholic that devasted her and the kids.
I never married till I was fifty! So I haven't had enough time to drive my husband crazy yet!!!
But yes, marriage is tough stuff. You are not an outcast...whether single or married or once-married as you are, you are NOT an outcast. You are a child of God who now has you all to himself so you can write postcards and bless His other children!!
Love u
DarlaC
loved your journal .....hope youre ok my dear friend ... take care .....god bless glitter hugs ....xxxxxxxxxx
ladyglitter
you are important ,just cos your you!And you have the added blessings of your children.Take care ,love and hugs ,sharon xoxoxoxoxoxo
Rocky7
Voooooooooonnn eeeeeeeeeeeey!
Hush up about being an outcast!
You are just as Darla said.....
A child of God who gives the word of God to others and says much needed prayers for us.
There is NO in-between. Don't look at it like that. Your WISDOM and great big heart is WHO you ARE!
I understnad how you felt saddened tho.
Is because of PAST and nothing you can do to change that.
God KNOWS your heart!! Our sins and all.
It is the present that matters. This Moment.
God forgives us when we ask and I KNOW you have nothing to be ashamed
of. You told me your story and hon,
it's NOTHING!
God looks at you now. All the greatness YOU see and all His beauty to us.
You have that inner sight that sees all the goodness.
Just be in peace. And let God fill you to the brim with His light!!
Amen..
Love you much,
KZ
doneitall