HumbleRoots's Journal

I did something bad for myself again last night.  I feel the shame this morning.

I  did something good for myself this morning, and reached out to www.womenforsobriety.org.

I feel the hope this morning.

I went to celebrate a friend's birthday, shared two bottles of wine between three people, over a three hour period, and got in the car to drive an hour through the country at night...to get home.

And even though, it seemed Ok, I know it wasn't Ok.  I take a breath and am thankful for today.

I know the combination of anti-depressants and alcohol was not good for me, for anyone, and most of all for anyone I may have hurt by driving last night. 

I reached out, and want to stop, to stay sober, stop drinking all together, I know, is a must.

I need to stay on track...I will try this group, plan to attend a meeting, and continue to see my therapist.

I know I have to minimize the hours on my job, and just stick to the simple tasks.  No going back to the big executive plans right now...I wouldn't be able to mentally or emotionally handle it.....even though it may be what we need to help pull us out of financial turmoil.  

Journaling helps....and I believe GOD WILL HELP pull me through....one day at a time, as He has done so far.  He is teaching me quite a bit about myself through these tests and challenges....but He has given me the STRENGTH and KNOWLEDGE to do better - and save myself....for the sake of my sweet life.