gaeryk's Journal

Journal Entry for June 3, 2008 Mood

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

So I just realezed what my funk today is all about. Got to watch my dad die 2 years ago today. It was worse last year and I had someone to try and comfort me, even though it was only over the phone. And guess what? I just remembered the conversation. Needless to say, another bad memory from a time I wish I could forget. <sigh>

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You've got friends here to help comfort you...

justagirl101
I'm sorry honey. I wish I could be there for you in person. I could at least give you a hug. Warm hugs are so therapeutic. :*(

SugarEmbargo
I need one badly. It's not that I'm upset about my dad being gone...we never got along, long history there. It's just so many things surrounding it. As much as I didn't love my dad, watching him die is an awful thing. Both the things I feel, and the things I don't and should. The memories from last year and the person who helped me through it.....just as haunting. I seriously hate my memories. When it all hit me yesterday...I sunk a bit back into depression. The events since have not helped. Still in that bad place for the first time in a while now. What makes it worse it the accompanying fear of so many things now setting in.

gaeryk
im here to help you support you through these memeories any time you need
i know you can bypass the memories of this person you have done it before you can do it again
big hugs x

inrealpain
Thank you. Sometimes I really do think she ruined my life...and it's my fault for letting it happen.

gaeryk
She didn't ruin your life. And she certainly didn't ruin you...

justagirl101