1411 things to do
First, the pain is more manage-able and I have a new medecine to try, but haven't tried it yet (it makes you …
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As much as I love my students and teaching I sure wish I were able to be on sick leave already and not be working right now. I think it has been a little too much to work and keep going to appointments almost daily and have a job that follows me home when I drag my sorry butt home feeling exhausted day after day for months (more than 5 months of almost daily appointments - but who's counting???) and more than a year of constant headache of varying intensity. The pain is unbearable the last few days. Today, I thought, 'Ok, I have trouble coping with my students because of the pain and I have prescription pain medecine, so why don't I take the pain medecine?' So I took some. Then later I remembered the 12+ page questionnaire that came from Mayo Clinic yesterday and one of the questions was about having taken pain medications. I hope it won't make them delay the surgery. I need to call someone there to get some advice. Do I just tough it out or do I take something for the pain to get me through the last 7 days with my students?
There is stress closing in on me from all sides: work, home, family and I have so much pain with the headaches, in the TMJs, and in the body in general, that I can't think straight and can't cope well with the stress. I was trying to help a student after school when some obnoxious unknown student in the hallway slammed my classroom door shut causing a thundering bang - for the 3rd time today.
That time I cried.
I don't cry easily. Let me rephrase that. In the past I didn't cry easily. Now I cry often. But it has still been very rare at school. However, my eyes leak quite often, even when I am not conciously crying, They just leak copiously. I wonder if it is a form of silent tears or if it is some effect of the tumor or if it could be related to allergies. I know that the amount of work I have to do to get through next week will require superhuman strength and I don't have it so I don't know how I am going to make it. I have to write final exams, make lessons plans for a sub that doesn't know the language and will not be able to use the text books because the librarian wants to collect them, along with electronic equipment and also close the library so that the lesson plans cannot include research projects or some of the other wonderful ideas I had considered. I also have to pack up my classroom "in case it will be moved" again for about the fourth year in a row.
I've made quite a bit of progress with that, but that is definitely an added strain that I would have loved not to have to consider. My personal paperwork is in dissarray and my yardwork is barely begun. At least I have most of the branches and debris that were all ove rthe front yard raked up so that I can mow there. I'll try to rake in the back and get some mowing done this weekend. I've done the raking a little bit at a time, which is how I'be been approaching the packing in my classroom. Well, when I started this post it was Friday and now that I'm going to close it is Saturday. I need some sleep so I can get through this better. Hopefully that will help fight off the sinusitis, too.
There is stress closing in on me from all sides: work, home, family and I have so much pain with the headaches, in the TMJs, and in the body in general, that I can't think straight and can't cope well with the stress. I was trying to help a student after school when some obnoxious unknown student in the hallway slammed my classroom door shut causing a thundering bang - for the 3rd time today. That time I cried. I don't cry easily. Let me rephrase that. In the past I didn't cry easily. Now I cry often. But it has still been very rare at school. However, my eyes leak quite often, even when I am not conciously crying, They just leak copiously. I wonder if it is a form of silent tears or if it is some effect of the tumor or if it could be related to allergies. I know that the amount of work I have to do to get through next week will require superhuman strength and I don't have it so I don't know how I am going to make it. I have to write final exams, make lessons plans for a sub that doesn't know the language and will not be able to use the text books because the librarian wants to collect them, along with electronic equipment and also close the library so that the lesson plans cannot include research projects or some of the other wonderful ideas I had considered. I also have to pack up my classroom "in case it will be moved" again for about the fourth year in a row. I've made quite a bit of progress with that, but that is definitely an added strain that I would have loved not to have to consider. My personal paperwork is in dissarray and my yardwork is barely begun. At least I have most of the branches and debris that were all ove rthe front yard raked up so that I can mow there. I'll try to rake in the back and get some mowing done this weekend. I've done the raking a little bit at a time, which is how I'be been approaching the packing in my classroom. Well, when I started this post it was Friday and now that I'm going to close it is Saturday. I need some sleep so I can get through this better. Hopefully that will help fight off the sinusitis, too.Comments
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What a herculean effort to remain professional under your circumstances,many would have thrown in the towel long ago.When your pain is over and your health normalized,you will be able to look back with pride knowing you did what you could to minimize disruption to your students learning,Well done Rose!! God bless you,PETER
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